Tina: “Yep, won’t be a minute.”

Bette: “Oh, it’s not that. I was wondering, if you are OK about sleeping in our room, our bed” and suddenly the door opens, Tina looks serious.

Tina: “I am very OK with Bette, are you?”

Bette: I am taken back by Tina’s determination. “Yes.” I say more sure than I feel. I notice the towel wrapped around Tina and she is no less beautiful than I remember.

Tina: “Bette, do you have any pj’s?” Not that I mind Bette looking at me like that and I feel her eyes looking straight through the towel.

Bette: I feel like I have been caught with my hand in the cookie jar. “Yes, yes of course.” And I make my way to get them. I follow suit and decide to have a shower myself and change into some light silk pj’s. I am secretly half hoping Tina is asleep when I get to bed. I unconsciously take a long time in the bathroom. I walk into the bedroom and Tina is in bed, awake, on her usual side.

Tina: “Does that feel better?”

Bette: “Yes thank you, and you?” as I approach the bed. I pull back the covers and slide under on what is traditionally my side, not feeling at all sure about any of this. Not quite how I imagined our reunion, I think. I lie on my back with my hands behind my head, looking up at the ceiling. Tina turns on her side and faces me. I can feel her watching me, she says nothing, just watches.

Bette: “Well, goodnight, shall I turn the light out?”

Tina: “Goodnight, yes.”

In the dark I can feel Tina’s gaze unwavering as she studies me. Tina could always read me better than anybody I knew, she always knew what I didn’t say and could read by body language exquisitely. At the same time we start to speak. I was going to ask if she wanted me to hold her. “You first” I say. Tina does not respond verbally but makes her way to my side of the bed and places her head on my chest. I tentatively put one arm around her and ever so slightly pull her in. God it feels good, so warm and soft, and excitable. I can feel Tee’s tiny shallow breath’s as she falls off to sleep, she too is exhausted and I am glad she did not drive home now. I pull her in closer and her full soft breast is not lost on me. Was it ever? Yet, sleep does not come easily to me. I hesitate to move, I do not want to wake her. Eventually I doze on and off. At exactly 03:52am I accept that I cannot sleep. Tina is sleeping soundly. Without waking her I slip out from under her. I pour myself a scotch and marvel at how things turn out. Not 12 hours ago I was screaming at Tina in a parking lot. I make my way out the back and sit on the chairs by the pool. The breeze is warm but delicate. I contemplate painting. Painting and paintings had been a god send for me when I was away. They became a way for me to express and identify with emotions without having to feel compromised or threatened. There were days when I spent hours I front of some the world’s masterpieces and unknown paintings, drawings and sculptures having our own private conversation. I watched the lights and swirling my drink gently, having lost track of the time.

Tina: When I woke and realized Bette was not with me I flew into a momentarily panic. I took a couple of minute to settle myself before I looked for her. “Is this what you did when you where hear alone?”

Bette: I hadn’t heard Tina get up at all. I didn’t turn around. “Yes.” Is my sole response.

Tina: “Bette” I put my arms around Bette from behind. “You are not alone now, you don’t need to be lonely, if you don’t want to be. I’m sorry you were lonely.” And I mean that sincerely.

Bette: I say nothing as Tina speaks gently to me.

Tina: “Please come back to bed Bette?”

Bette: I put my drink down and stand up.

Tina: “One day, maybe you can tell me about it, whatever it was you were thinking out there.”

Bette: “Come on.” I reach for Tina’s hand. “Let’s go back to bed.”