She was so beautiful as she lie there sleeping soundly in her favorite red bottoms and a plain white tank. I allowed my eyes to roam over her beauty, watching as her chest rose and fell as she rhythmically breathed. Her scent overtook my nostrils as I inhaled. She always smelled good, but the way she smelled in the morning was breathtaking.

Her eyes slowly fluttered open, and I smiled – I couldn’t help myself. “Morning,” I said as I leaned over to kiss her softly on the lips, slowly rising as my eyes met hers. I stayed that way, literally inches from her face and it hit me – I didn’t know I was going to do it, even when I said it, it was like an out of body experience.

I could see both of us laying there, the sun slowly spilling in reaching across the floor.  And then the words just came out, “Marry me.” It wasn’t a question, just a simple statement. The words just came out, I couldn’t stop them, not that I wanted too, but I just always imagined it happening so differently. “You’re serious aren’t you,” she asked, looking up at me, her eyes searching mine hearing the intensity in my voice and in the two words. “Yesyes I am. I don’t think I’ve ever been more serious. This is what I want; this is where I want to be – with you, every morning – waking up next to you, knowing that we are going to be together forever no matter what.” “Oh my godyou are serious. Wowwhat a way to wake up,” she replied sounding both shocked and excited.

I slowly lifted myself from above her as she sat up slowly. She scooted up in the bed propping herself up against the headboard, ran her hand through her hair, rubbed her eyes and then took a deep breath before she spoke. “I love you, I always have” she softly smiled and continued, her eyes holding mine, “And I knew when we met that you were going to be someone important to me, to my life.” She stopped, placing a strand of hair behind her ear and inhaling and exhaling deeply before continuing, “I knew that when we kissed, we were going to change both of our lives forever. I knew that when we made love for the first time, there was definitely no going back. I knew that when we moved in together, it was either going to make us or break us. I knew that through our arguments, disagreements, make-ups, compromises – I knew that through it all I’ve always loved you. We’re here now and I know that I love you. I know that I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember. I know that no matter what, we can make anything happen for us. I know that I can see myself with you today, tomorrow and forever, because you are my past, my present and my future and.” she trailed off as she grabbed my hands and held them in hers, holding her gaze steady as she continued to look into my eyes, “if you are sure” “More than anything, I know I’m sure of this, of us,” I interrupted squeezing her hands softly but firmly. She reciprocated the gesture as she replied, “I think you know my answer, I think you’ve always known what I would say – well at least I’ve always known what I’d say.”

She still didn’t answer me and she knew that I hated unnecessary tension, but she kept on.

She averted her gaze, looked towards the window, and withdrew her hands from mine. I dropped my head, not wanting to face what could happen next. God, during those brief seconds, I feared the worst. Thoughts ran through my mind like wild horses. But before I could concentrate on one single thing, I felt her hands cup my face and lift it to meet hers. She sat up, putting her legs beneath her and leaned forward, now inches from my face. She looked into my eyes and whispered “yes,” as she continued to lean, her lips softly brushing mine.

Well, that was it that was my defining moment of realization, where I realized that I wanted to live my life with her, for her, most importantly for us. It was four years ago, and I still remember it like it happened yesterday. Every morning that I wake up before she does, I sit up and watch her, relishing in our lives. Sometimes she catches me, and she smiles, knowing what I’m thinking. It still surprises me everyday. But in my heart, I’ve known that she is my past, she is my present and she will always be my future.