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Tongue Tales – Bette Porter L Word
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Phyllis looks swept away suddenly by the memory. She shivers with delight. I sigh deeply, I remember this place. I stir my salad around stalling.
“Phyllis, maybe if you left for an hour and then came back, maybe in a week or two, I’d have time to think about it.”
“Bette, I don’t have weeks! I’ve got to know, now!” Phyllis insists and then sighs, “I’m seeing Alice again tonight.”
Why isn’t my phone ringing? Are all the world’s plaguing interruptions suddenly on a fucking lunch break? I shake my head, my eyes back on my salad again.
“Bette, being tongue tied is so unlike the way Alice describes you.” Phyllis crosses her arms satisfied. ”She says you’re an expert tongue twister, and can do anything. So! Illuminate me!”
I ignore her. I’m furious with Alice. Furious with Alice!
”Bette? Why don’t you like sex toys? Alice says that’s probably the reason you two broke up.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose, and look up at the ceiling hoping for a sudden escape. There’s no emergency ladder descending. No rope dropping down from the skies that I could strangle Phyllis with and then hang myself. I squint my eyes shut as I hear pencils and pens rattle as Phyllis disturbs them on my desk. Her fidgeting I hope a prelude to her timely exit. My eyes fly open as I feel my ruler press against my hand.
”That’s it! You don’t need any. Look how long your fingers are.” She stares at me in wonderment.
I glare at her incensed and swat Phyllis and my ruler away. ”Phyllis! Goddammit! How would you like it if I measured parts of you?”
”Put credit where credit is due, I always say.” Phyllis sets my ruler back into the cup. She studies my face. ”Bette, don’t go all Third Wave post modern on me.” She points to my lips and brushes against her own.
”What?” I wipe my mouth with my napkin for any salad leaves if that’s what she’s talking about.
”Just up front there, a tiny bit on your tooth.” She points at her own.
I take a sip of green tea and hope that washes whatever it is away. For the love of God when is Phyllis going to leave my office?
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Phyllis’s is too much. Too funny. Thanks
Oh I soooo loved the conversation that Phyllis and Bette had…Lmao!….She con Bette to see her tongue?
omg! I gotta hand it to Alice…She’s one brave women to be able to endure the very mad Bette Porter?!…
LOL! ..When Shane doesn’t know if she would agreed to Alice or give her support to Bette?
Love the pic BB! The smirking Bette is very fitting to the narrative.
And Tina’s picture?…how i picture her in my head…*swoon*…
What a fun read! Bette was always made out to have mad skills in the loving ladies department while eschewing the use of sex toys. Now, thanks to you, we know the real reason that she is/was so successful. How exasperating is Alice? She goes beyond the pale. Isn’t she like one of Bette’s BFs? That’s not how a best friend acts.
My personal wish is that Jodi doesn’t get involved w/Bette on an intimate level. IMO, Marlee Matlin was a poor choice as Bette’s lover. Physically, she wasn’t Bette’s type and I could never believe that she was comfortable being cast as a lesbian especially b/c she was a personal friend of Jennifer Beals. She seemed so stilted in the love scenes compared to JB and LuH.
Great! Meeting with Phyllis – just hilarious. Good smack down on Alice.
Thank you!!!
That’s for the post. I love your spin on things. Great fun in this one.
Hilarious!!! Great read. Thanks. Your writing has a huge range. From sad and introspective to funny and light hearted. Wonderful dialogue.
The conversation was just so funny between Bette and Phyllis! Poor Bette, she never get a quiet lunch! :D
Alice …. I seriously wonder how much she can get away with? (she was not my favorite character ever!)
I hope Jodie does not mix in it too much. :)
lez girls, I have come to expect this part. I’m wondering whether Tina will see a few truth in the book?
I love it. I love the way you write.
I looking forward to the next chapter.
I always thought the lez girls a interesting point in the show. but it remained unfinished as most of the stuff (thanks to IC)
I am glad that I gave you inspiration/idea ;)
One of the best potential scenes in TLW was the one in which Jodi is sketching while Bette is sleeping. I say, potentially, b/c Jodi just did not cut (IMO) it in the romantic scenes. It had the potential to be so erotic, sexy and sensual but Jodi touched Bette’s breasts like a safecracker trying to open a safe (Okay, a bit hyperbole, but still). She kissed Bette like she was going out the door for work. No passion (again my opinion), rather perfunctory. Leave it up to IC to have one of the sexiest scenes in daylight to be between Bette and Jodi. Damn you, Ilene, you brought us innovation and freshness and then mangled it in so many ways.
Blackbird – this chapter was hysterical. It brought me back to some of my favorite moments on the show with Alice and Bette while Alice was dating and then trying to break up with Phyllis. Bette was at her comedic best and for a change it was lighthearted fun even though it was mixed in with some drama. I also liked how Bette and Phyllis played off each other. Post Tina and pre Jodi Bette was finally finding herself again. Too bad it didn’t last. Tina broke her heart and Jodi broke her spirit. I always wished that Bette could have found her match without having to lose her identity and become a shadow of herself. Thanks for taking us on this journey.
Phyllis is nuts.Funny story,thank you.
BB..u never seize 2 amaze me. you have tremendous talent my friend. it was fun reading the dialogue between Bette n Phyllis. I was actually lol. Hilarious. Sorry I’ve slacked off commenting on ur posts,but I’m reading “The first phone call from heaven” n will finish it soon n will have more time, promise. Thx 4 your posts n keep’m coming. I’ve read all of them, just haven’t commented on’m. Pics you’re using go well with the stories. I’m glad you’ve kept Jodie out of the picture. Now 4 some brewskies 2 get this weekend started…bottoms up my dear BB!! Enjoy your weekend!!
You gotta love Phyllis and Alice !
A great, funny Chapter and 4 wonderful pictures of JB and 1 of LuH :D
Thanks BB :)