At Alices…

After another hour of exchanging war stories, venting to each other, and taking time to connect in a new way, Tina excused herself from Dana and Alice and went into the bedroom. She was enjoying their company, but needed some time alone to clear her mind and decide on how much longer she planned to stay at Alices. The love and support shed received since the fight was rehabilitating, but she needed to start figuring out where her life was heading and how she was going to move on. She pulled out her journal, made some notes about what had happened, and then began an action plan. First she would get a room in a hotel for a few days until she could find an apartment, get her things from the house, schedule an appointment with Dr. Bradshaw for a follow up visit, and find a new therapist. Her recent outbursts scared her and she needed to resolve them before they became her only way to deal with her stress and anxiety. As she continued to write, she found herself getting sleepy and drifted into a light sleep.

Hey Tina, remember me? The voice asked. Seems like youve toughened up over the years huh? Im impressed! Never thought you had it in ya to stand up to anyone, it continued making Tina toss and turn. You must really like her if youre willing to fight back or did you just get tired of being beat up and put down? Tinas eyes flickered, but didnt open as she still tossed and stirred. I guess that bump on the head finally knocked some sense into ya. Ha, ha, ha, ha ha! It said one last time and disappeared.

Lisa Doyle! Tina said out loud immediately waking from her slumber.

At Yolandas

Yolanda turned the monitor off after completing her research on Bettes past to include gathering information on Melvin whom she too loathed by association it had to come from somewhere, she thought. She thought about the therapy sessions where Bette sat silently controlling Tina, stifling her need to express herself and how frustrating it was to watch her gloat. Yolanda despised Bettes demeanor and self-indulgence and she hated that Bette refused to see herself as anything but an ivy league educated, white-collared, above average woman who loathed the blackness she came from and would do anything to ignore that part of herself.

Still trying to plan her next move, she tapped on the keyboard of her computer while staring at the number indelibly marked on the paper. Bette, Bette, Bette, she said. How I wish Id never met you. Better still, how I wish youd never met Candace. I know were not together anymore, but shes my friend and I still care about her. You both have weaved a right web, but I hold it more against you Bette for not being able to say no and remember you had a wife at home. A WHITE wife, Yolanda emphasized. Its a shame youre so far detached from your own identity that you had to reach out to a woman of color to bring something back to yourself. Oh fuel for my fire Bette, fuel for my fire, she mused, before being interrupted by the phone.

Bettes house

Bette sat down and ran her fingers over her lips still feeling Candaces terse kiss. A chill ran through her knowing that Candace held a powerful ace card over her, and in spite of all the madness she couldnt shake her feeling of captivity. Her heart longed for Tina, but her body craved Candace. Confusion ravished her brain and a headache ensued. Feeling she deserved the pain, Bette refused to take anything for it and sat on the couch cradling the pillow as she rocked back and forth. A fraction of light caught her left hand and her ring radiated against the wall making her stop rocking and look down at the chiseled golden band that once symbolized everything she held sacred. She recalled the ceremony, their vows, and how theyd pledged their eternal love to each other, which was now nothing but hollow words stolen by her infidelity. Bette stood slowly, walked into the kitchen, opened the drawer, and pulled out a small bottle of oil paint. She opened it and painted her ring red.

Marked for life as the Scarlet Woman, she said sadly. No one to blame but yourself Bette. Candace was right; Im not woman enough for her because I cant even be a woman to myself so how can I be a woman to anyone else? She continued her one sided conversation. Tina doesnt want me, Candace doesnt want me, and now I have no one, Bette burst into tears! She didnt want to, but she couldnt help it. Loneliness took over as she looked around the house with it conflicted memories. Shed always had someone there for her and with her and now she realized for the first time that she was completely and totally alone. She couldnt call the gang because they were all rallying around Tina. She didnt want to call Kit because she was still embarrassed about what shed done.

I have to call her. I need to talk to her, Bette began again. She has to hear me out. She cant end it, she just cant. I love her, I love her more than she knows, she went on, reaching out for the phone. She waited anxiously for an answer.

Hello? She spoke nervously. Wait, wait! She pleaded. Please, I beg you, just hear me out. No? Why not? Tina please, Im so sorry and I want to try to make this right with you. Too late? No, no, no, it cant be. God! Please dont say that Tina. Say anything BUT that. Okay. Okay. Fine. Bye. Bette hurled the phone across the room bitter and angry that the call didnt yield any favorable results.

Realizing that shed be spending a lot of time alone, Bette took the only solace she could find in a bottle of wine, which she drank right out of the bottle until she passed out from exhaustion.

On the other side of town

Candace trashed the piece shed been working on. Shed tried repeatedly to make something of the wood shed been witling on, but it took no form. She poured shots of Jack Daniels until the alcohol finally tamed her ravaged mind. She stared at the phone wanting to dial Bettes number, but it was useless, it was over. Shed made it over when she walked out leaving Bette with nothing but harsh, terminal words. They were really words to force her to take a deeper look at herself in order to get through the situation and not a true declaration of her wanting out. Candace thought of Tina and how she must have felt hearing and seeing them in a compromising position. Shame filled her heart and tears welled in her eyes. It wasnt her intention to hurt Tina, but it was too late now. Candace needed someone to comfort her, someone to take her mind off of her pain. She picked up the phone, dialed the numbers, and waited for the voice to answer.

Hey you, Candace replied, trying to sound cheerful. Im okay, you? Yeah, fine. Im fine. Uhm, well yeah, it went okay. Well, uhm, not as well as I expected, Candace strained to choke back the tears and not let Yolanda hear the tension in her voice. Is that offer for coffee still available? Just need a shoulder right now. This day kinda got the best of me. Yeah, Ill meet you at Joels in twenty. Okay, bye, Candace hung up, but could tell from Yolandas tone that she knew something was wrong. She hoped she could pull herself together so she wouldnt break down in front of her.

Yolanda saw Candaces call as a blessing. It was undeniably well timed allowing her the opportunity to extract the details she knew Candace wouldnt want to divulge and use it all against Bette when the right time presented itself. Luck was more than a lady for her! She moved away from her desk and got ready to go meet Candace.

Oh, Candace, I wish it didnt have to be like this because I do still care for you, but youve opened a door, I just cant close right now, she said as she walked out the door.

Back at Alices

Tina turned her cell off. Shed had enough of Bettes confessions, which came only after shed been caught. She couldnt take any interruptions from her action plan. Recalling Lisa Doyle was more than enough distractions for one evening. The recollection made her feel uneasy and question the repressed memory that now surfaced. She added that to her existing list of things to discuss with the new therapist. Tina closed her journal, fixed, her clothes, and walked out of the bedroom. Alice and Dana were cuddling on the couch watching a movie and she didnt want to disturb them, so she opted to leave.

Hey gals, she said sweetly. Im gonna go out for a while okay?

What? Why? Alice inquired, sitting up.

Not sure really. I dont want to cramp you guys and I cant write anymore, I tried to take a nap, but it got cut short by dumb thoughts, Bette called and

Bette called? Dana jumped in. Sorry, didnt mean to cut you off. Are you going to see her?

She wants to talk, but I cant do that right now. Im not ready. Im just gonna go out and see where I end up, Tina stated heading toward the door.

Alice jumped up and ran to stop her.

Are you sure youre in the right state of mind to go anywhere?

Al, Im fine. I appreciate everything you guys have done and your love keeps me going, but for now, I just need to be out for a while. Im all talked out. I just need some me time, Tina hugged Alice and walked out.

Im calling Bette, Alice snapped. Ive had enough of this ***** *****. Tina fighting, Bette still lying, Candace at the house. Enough is enough!

But Al, you cant do that, Dana warned.

The ***** I cant Dana, Alice snapped back. I have just cause to call her and Im gonna even if it means risking our friendship. Im not gonna cover for her anymore, Alice fumed.

Dana looked at her with concern and confusion. She couldnt understand what was going on and knew that Alice wasnt going to tell her any time soon so, she went back to the couch and tried to get back into the movie.

Answer the phone dammit, Alice ranted. Dana, do me a favor, call Tina from your cell and tell her that whatever she does, dont go back to the house, when I get through with Bette, thats the last place I want her to be.

Alice, what the ***** is going on?

Look, Im not in a good mood anymore and if youre gonna have a hard time dealing with it, maybe you need to leave, Alice stated, putting her finger in the air. Yeah, Bette! I dont give a ***** if you were sleeping or whatever, but were gonna talk