“You’re afraid?  Of what?”

“Everything” came the reply

This was said with such conviction it caused the blonde to gasp audibly.  Here in the middle of the night in the privacy of their own room this strong beautiful woman of hers was exposing her vulnerabilities.  Tina recognised it for what it was…significant.   It was not often that Bette Porter admitted to anything that could be considered a weakness and in Porter land fear was definitely a weakness.

Tina rearranged the pillows behind her making herself comfortable.  She encouraged Bette to lay her head in her lap and slowly she ran her hands through the brunette’s curls.

“Everything like what?”

“I’m afraid I won’t be able to support you both,  I’m afraid I’ll feel resentful of what we have to give up when we become parents, I’m afraid I won’t be a good parent, I’m afraid of watching you in pain in labour and I know it’s selfish to be afraid of that because you’re the one who has to go through it, and that makes me afraid of who I’m becoming. Most of all I’m afraid of what you’ll think of me when you realise how bad I am at all this.”  Bette’s voice tapered off as she finally voiced the demons that had been building in her head these past few weeks.

Tina continued gently combing her fingers through Bette’s hair as she thought about what to say to her.  The silence was alarming to Bette however.  She rolled over slightly and looked up into Tina’s face with sad dark eyes.

“You’re dissapaointed in me” she stated in a tone of resignation.

This broke Tina from her musings. 

“No baby” she reassured seeking out Bette’s hand and entwining their fingers. 

“Never” she whispered 

“I’m just so relieved.  These past few weeks I’ve been so scared that this was about us, that you had fallen out of love with me, that you regretted making this baby with me.  Now though I now the truth.  And I know us.  I know what we have and I know that we’ll figure this out.  We’ll talk this all through and you’ll see that it’s ok to be afraid.  I’m afraid of some of those things too.  It’s normal,  we just have to talk to one another and we’ll get through it.” Tina concluded reassuringly.

“We will?” 

“Yeah baby we will, because we love one another, and we’re strong and as long as we stick together we can get through anything.”

“We can” Bette returned smiling this time the question gone from her voice.

“Anything” Tina reassured leaning forward and kissing Bette gently

They lay there then Bette’s head in Tina’s lap in comfortable silence for a few moments before Tina gently asked,

“Do you want to talk more about this now or can it wait till the morning now that you know we’re going to figure it out?”

“It can wait until the morning sleepy-head” Bette grinned as she sat up and reached to switch off the light.  As she did so Tina rearranged herself and lay down on her side reaching for Bette’s arm to pull around her as she snuggled back into the brunette.

Bette found herself quickly dozing off her mind cleared but she was interrupted.

“Baby” Tina said inquisitively

“Mmhmm” Bette responded

“Why are we on the wrong sides of the bed?”

“Long story” Bette mumbled as she smiled and rested her head in the nape of Tina’s neck.