Jenny was smart. She was perceptive. She looked at Shane and saw the regret and her jaw tensed.

“It was a game for you, wasn’t it?”, she whispered in a painful hiss.

Shane swallowed, shaking her eyes, refusing to meet her gaze.

“No. You were never a game to me, but…”, she pursed her lips, “…Can’t you see how wrong is that? Don’t you feel… weird?”.

“Weird is good”, Jenny replied seriously.

“Not always. We’ve crossed the line, Jen. It shouldn’t have happened…”, Shane put her tank top on and grabbed her jeans, “…It won’t happen again. I’m sorry”.

”… It is a circle, there is a plan
dead skin will atrophy itself to start again
Look closely at the open wound
see past what covers the surface
Underneath chaotic catastrophe,
creation takes stage…”

***

Shane looked up and squirmed against the sun despite her sunglasses. The building was tall and seemed a giant ready to swallow her up.

“Fuck…”, she hissed through her gritted teeth, entering the hall and motioning to the elevator. The weight of the bag on her shoulder would keep her anchored to reality, even when her head would spin, even when she would feel Jenny’s taste into her mouth. So far, Shane hadn’t been able to make it go away and it was still haunting her.

A week had passed and Shane had slept on Alice’s couch, spending at least four hours per day looking for a new apartment to move in. Alone.

She had stubbornly avoided Alice’s disgusted looks when she had mentioned her sex night with Jenny, but the truth was the Shane was totally unable to look at herself in the mirror, now. And she would see her own mistake reflected into her best friend’s eyes.

She couldn’t stand it.

She needed to go away from all the drama. She needed to purify and figure out how and why she had become the person she had become, how and why she had done the things she had done, how and why she would feel like her whole life was falling down around her.

And there it was, her new apartment. Seventh floor of that building, right in the brains of that giant of stone.

“It’ll now swallow me up. That, I already did it myself”, Shane thought, shaking her head, as the elevator started moving.