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    Walking After You ch.3

    Story written on February 6, 2006 by 7PM.
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    75 votes, average: 2.99 out of 575 votes, average: 2.99 out of 575 votes, average: 2.99 out of 575 votes, average: 2.99 out of 575 votes, average: 2.99 out of 5 (75 votes, average: 2.99 out of 5)
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    Number of Comments: 10
    Words: 1655
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=59437
    Author Notes:

    Having trouble connecting? BT

         Bette walked in through the front door half
    hoping Tina would not be home yet. She glanced at the wall clock. 6:00
    pm.

        “Tina?” Bette called out tentatively. When no one
    answered, Bette sighed in relief. She’d rushed home from the CAC,
    wanting to have some time alone at the house before Tina came home. If
    she were to ask herself why she wanted that, she would’ve come up
    empty. Bette heaved her bag onto the couch and headed to the bedroom.

        “Tina?” She called out again, just to make sure. In
    a sudden fit of paranoia, she tugged open the closet door and waited to
    see if Tina would come tumbling out. When no one did, Bette smiled to
    herself.

        Bette didn’t know why she wanted the house to be
    empty. She didn’t know why the thought of seeing Tina was making her
    edgy. All she knew was that for the first time in two months, she felt
    like she could breathe. She inhaled deeply and frowned when she smelled
    Tina’s scent still in the air. She walked to the bathroom and quickly
    drew a bath. She got into the warm water and felt tears prickle at the
    back of her throat.

        What the hell is wrong with me? Bette wondered. I’m
    about to cry in the bath, how stereotypically emotionally unstable is
    that?! Is this what I’ve become? Hiding out from my lover, wishing to
    be alone, scrubbing my skin raw where she has touched me? I don’t know
    what the fuck is happening to me.

        Bette closed her eyes and tried to remember when she
    started to feel this way. Like her skin was too tight and any moment it
    would split apart and her soul would ooze out.

        Did it start when I moved in with Tina? Did the
    noose start tightening then? Did it start the first time she made love
    to me on our newly-christened bed, or later when she told me that we
    would be together forever?

        Is this commitment phobia? Bette had read enough
    self-help books to wonder if she wasn’t one of those morons who were
    afraid of intimacy. Bette scoffed loudly and shook her head. Why would
    I be afraid now, when Tina and I are virtually joined at the hip?

        She’ll leave you, you know.

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    Comments

    1. “experience had taught her that sometimes Bette didn’t really mean what she said.” Hmm. They both seem to have trouble with that and it looks like trouble is looming. This is intense even though the dialogue and internal monologues seem to run so smoothly and simply. Can’t wait to see what they’re respect pscyhes are really hiding or really wanting to do. Look forward to the next one. (TMerlin)

    5. ‘She’ll leave you, you know.’ I know from experience that your own mind is very powerful and it’s possible to conjur up insane ideas and think about them so much you begin to believe them. Like smiley said, Candyass really did a number on Bette, and Bette’s mind is still stuck on her. It’s a wonder she even let Tina get that close to her. If she keeps thinking Tina will leave, she will unconsciously (or maybe consciously) do, think, and say things that will eventually drive Tina away. I really think Bette needs to talk to a psychotherapist. This isn’t something drugs will fix, but therapy could help if she can only voice her fears to an unbiased person.

    7. 7Pm I adore this Bette. I know that sounds weird but it’s a cute crazy..if that’s possible. I know her cutness could get them in trouble but it’s a part of her…they’re gonna have to learn to deal

    8. I certainly understand where Lamentamini is coming from, even agree in large part, but sometimes that small voice tells you what is or will be objective fact that you’re not allowing yourself to see otherwise and devoid of the self-fulfilling prophecy thing. At least it has for me. Admire your depiction of the characters’ interior monologues.

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