She closed her eyes, trying to calm herself and push down that fierce ache that any thought of Candace and Bette together still caused.

Tina didnt want to keep re-hashing it, they had flung angry words at each other enough.

Im sorry, she breathed, I dont know where that came from.

Bette looked up through her eyelashes, giving her the sad smile. Its ok T, I understand, she sighed deeply. Was there any chance at all they could ever get past this, Bette wondered?

Bette, I was the one who wanted to date, it was my choice to see you again,  and I didnt choose this just so I could torment you with the past. Its justsometimes I It just hits me, you know? And I feel that pain again, and want to lash out at you.  She couldnt meet Bettes eyes anymore, remembering that she was the one who *did * lash out, physically.

Bette reached across the table, drawing Tinas hands into a gentle grasp. She didnt speak, just trying to convey all her love and regret with a gentle look as their eyes met and held.

But for some reason, Tinas emotions were running riot. Scenes of Bette and Candace were racing through her head, followed by that terrible scene in their bedroom. Tina was disgusted with herself as well as Bette. The memory of that hurt came rushing back, and her utter despair and humiliation at the betrayal. Logically, Tina knew that she had accepted Bettes mistake, and her own part in their breakdown, and was coming to terms with things. She did want to see her again, try to rediscover their love. But was it too soon? Tonight, at least, it felt too soon. She pulled her hands away quickly.

Tina wasnt sure why the other day, it had all been about them, yet tonight, all she could see when she looked at her lover was someone who had let her down. It was all very confusing, but then feelings, emotions, passions were like that.

Listen Bette, Im sorry, but I really have to go, she said rising from her seat before the tears that were threatening her composure could escape.

Bettes bewildered look at the way things had gone from comfortable and friendly to turbulent and painful cut Tina, but she ignored the urge to touch her. For now, a tactical retreat was in order. Re-group, and be ready to tackle this reconciliation business again soon, she thought. When my irrational fears have been calmed a bit.

Look, I still have a lot to process Bette. Im sorry about tonight, she gathered her belongings. Ill call you, ok?

Bette watched her lover hurry from the restaurant, a little shocked at the way tonight had disintegrated in 2 minutes flat.

Depressed, she signaled for the check. Her talent for ***** things up was still going strong.