“Thanks,” Bette sounded offended

Candace was surprised.  “Did you?”

“No…no I didn’t.  I guess I was just so self-absorbed that I thought…I really don’t know what I thought.”

“Well, what’s done is done, Bette?  Do you want Tina back?”

“Yes, of course.  With everything I am, I want her back.”

“Have you talked to her?”

“I called a few hours ago for the first time.  It didn’t go well.  I was trying to give her time and space, but…I saw her today at this neighborhood place we go.  I tried to talk to her there, but she walked out.  This afternoon, I called.  She cut me off before I could get anything out.”

“So what do you do now?  Pick at your food, drink wine, wallow in self-pity?  What’s the plan?  Don’t consider taking up cigarettes, it’s a disgusting habit.  You want her back, what do you need to do?”

“Apologize.  Tell her it won’t happen again.”  Bette paused and stared deeply into Candace’s eyes. “It can never, ever happen again.  You understand that, right?”

“Yeah, I do.  If you and Tina can make a go of it, I won’t stand in the way of that.  If you can’t, well, all bets are off, Bette.”  Candace smiled at her.  “I find you extremely attractive.  I’d be lying if I said I didn’t like the way we are together.”

“Please, Candace.  Don’t do this.”

“I’m just saying.  C’mon, let’s make a To Do List to Win Tina’s Heart Again.”  She grabbed a pen from the pen and pencil holder and picked up a pad of paper.  She scribbled the title of the list and looked at Bette.  “Okay, what’d ya got?”

“One, apologize.”

“Apologize for…?”

“My infidelity when I told her that she could trust me with her heart.  Apologize for not keeping her feelings close at hand.  Apologize for what I did to her…what she and I did on her last night.”

Candace wrote as Bette spoke, but she looked up and jutted her chin out in question.  “What do you mean?”

Bette wiped her hand over her forehead and cheek, then held her face in the palm of her hand.  “When Tina confronted me, I tried to explain.  She slapped me, she hit me, and I grabbed her.  I pulled her onto the bed and I don’t know…For the past few weeks, Candace, I’ve lived a life outside of my own body.  Everything I’ve done has taken me by surprise.  My sister, Kit, God love her, but she’s the flighty one, does what she wants, when she wants, doesn’t think about consequences.  I’m the opposite.  Every angle I examine.  I prepare for every major event in my life.  And the not so major one’s?  I prepare for those, too.  But you walked into my organized and compartmentalized world and shifted it all around.  I forgot myself, then I lost myself.  I fucked you because I wanted to.  I let you ***** me because I knew I’d enjoy it.  I forced myself on Tina that night to prove to both of us that I still wanted her.”