She finally looked up at Bette and continued.

“I had to let the anger go.  In my heart I forgave you and you staying away for so long to be with her gave me the opportunity to let go of whatever feelings I may have had for you anger and love.  I had to in order to save this baby.  I didn’t like who I was becoming so I decided to concentrate on being a better mother to this child.  If you had said this to me 4 months ago we may still have had a chance.”

Bette angrily stood up and paced around the coffee table.

“I can’t help but feel that if you had told me about the pregnancy none of this would have happened.  You shut me out, and you abandoned me Tina just as much as I abandoned you.  So don’t put the blame solely on me you practically pushed me towards Candace.”

     Tina winced at the verbal punch and closed her eyes hoping to keep the tears at bay.  She could feel could feel her heart racing and took deep breaths to calm it down.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean”

“Yes you did, and FYI I didn’t tell you about the pregnancy in the beginning because I didn’t think you could take another miscarriage.  So I waited until everything was okay and I carried, at most, past the first trimester before I could surprise you.”

“I’m sorry”

“It’s done and over”

“I don’t want us to be done and over I can’t accept that.”

“It’s always about what you want isn’t it?  For the first time in 7 years you are not the center of my world.  This baby has taken that place and will always be in that place for as long as I live and breathe.  You are going to have to deal with it.”

“I would like a place in this baby’s life.”

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

“Why not?”

“Having 2 parents not living in the same house having a part-time home, I’m sorry, but that is not the way I want to raise my child.”

“Did you use our sperm?”

“Yes I used the last of the sperm we had saved in the cryogenic lab.”

“Then this is my baby and I have every right to be a part of his or her life.  Marcus was my friend and gave the sperm to us as a kind gesture and you cannot keep this child from me.  Besides, you’re not qualified to raise a biracial child.”

“I’m going to pretend that you just did not sound like my bigot dead father” Tina closed her eyes and started counting backwards from ten in her mind.  Bette could see that she was causing Tina distress.

“I’m sorry” Bette said but inwardly cursed at herself for saying such a thoughtless thing.

“You’re always sorry Bette” Tina opened her eyes to look at her.

“I just need to make things right with you” Bette got on her knees Tina’s chair.  “I just need a chance.  I can fix us.”  She said with confidence looking Tina in the eyes.

“You need to fix things so you can feel better about yourself” Tina got up from the chair pushing Bette away.  “There is no superglue for trust” she said as she walked to toward the front door.  “I can’t be around you because it still fucking hurts!”  She finally turned around with tears in her eyes as she opened the door and held it opened.  “Your time is up, now please leave.”  Bette got up from the floor and walked toward her.

“I know I fucked up” Bette reached the door and said to Tina, “this has been a devastating blow to our relationship.”

“You’re causing so much stress for me and the baby” Tina said as she looked Bette dead in the eyes “and I will not lose this baby.”

“I’m not trying to do that” Bette looked down at Tina’s hand on the door knob and covered it with her own then looked up at her, “I just want to be with you.”

“Goodnight Bette” Tina said as she looked away.

“Goodnight Tina” Bette sadly said then walked out.