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Work to Do Chapter 14
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Alice splayed her hands helplessly, shaking her head.
“I don’t understand it Dana. I look back now and I can’t believe I
behaved the way I did. I don’t understand how I convinced myself that
you how I didn’t see it was my own insecurities and fucked up issues
with relationships that were messing us up.”
Alice knelt down in front of Dana on the steps, unconsciously mimicking
Dana’s action in therapy the day before. She took her face in her hands.
“Dana, it was never
my lack of faith in you. I always loved you and trusted you. I know
that now, but if I’d admitted that to myself then, I’d have had to
admit that it was my fear of needing you that was destroying our
relationship…Does this make sense?”
Dana’s eyes were full. She was listening to Alice intently as if she
were waiting for something more. Alice saw that and her heart sank as
she realized what Dana was waiting for.
“Dana, I can’t,” she whispered. “I am SO not ready. I love you more
than I can say but you have to know that I’m not capable of what you
want.”
Dana’s eyes flickered a moment, Alice saw in them that she didn’t ‘know’ that at all. Dana’s expression changed almost imperceptibly before she gave Alice an encouraging nod.
“Okay,” she agreed simply.
Alice’s heart sank.
“It’s not okay,’ she sighed. ‘It’s really not. It sucks. This whole mess has been so unfair to you.”
Alice returned to her seat beside Dana. She focused on the dog park
across the street. “Dana… How come you never asked why I didn’t
connect our names together on the chart?”
They sat for a moment, watching the early morning dog walkers and their
dogs congregate. Alice grew unsure after a while if Dana had heard her
question.
When Dana finally looked at her, her expression told Alice that not
only had she heard her, she had understood the question behind it.
“You know, the very first time you showed me that chart I wondered if
our names would ever be connected. I wondered if you were thinking the
same thing when you showed it to me?” She looked at Alice shyly.
Alice’s nod acknowledged she had.
“After we got together, I checked for it all the time at first,” Dana admitted.
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Great chapter again! you kept us waiting so long this time… layla didn’t comment right after she posted it? weird…
This is weird I posted my comments twice but it wouldn’t show. Starlai, you crack me up LOL. Cape, blame Floroda and Thanksgiving all you want but this was a great update! Is it wrong that I find Dana’s insecurities and confusion endearing? Love Alice’s desparate attempts to reaasure her. So it is Dana’s turn to turn up at the doorstep in the early hours of the morning? :)
Another great chapter!, Hope all was well in Florida and Thanksgiving, thanks for the post!!
A saga indeed. What a great chapter, but oh, did my heart ache a little? yes it did.
Yay, I did back flips when I saw you (or Layla, I should say) finally posted. And I’m not acrobatic, so you understand the feat that was. Great chapter, but this time I felt a little pang of hurt instead of the usual warm fuzzies! Looking forward to the next installment.
Nooooo… they were doing so well – slowly getting more in the open, then BAM – the door shut. I was excited to see the new chapter up. With the holiday, I didn’t expect to see this until next week. Great job! I really like the layers to the the characters and their relationship.
I agree with Layla’s comment about Alice’s attempt to reassure Dana. It’s too bad that she can’t do that no matter how much she wants to. She just doesn’t seem capable of giving Dana what she knows that Dana wants right now.
cape – great post. again more misunderstandings – they really need to talk it out. they are still so cute though.
capes, are you taking lessons from jac, of course Alice (knocking her head the the palm of my hand) you and Dana are a couple. Can’t wait to see how you fix this. Great chapter looking foward to next week.
Oh cape_gray, I’ve loved both fics you’ve posted tonight. Dismembering an arm is slighty disturbing, but this fic made up for it. I loved what Dana had to say to Alice, first thing in the morning. You really have become a tease, I was expecting a ‘nap’ plus more but the tingling feeling I got after reading this makes up for that, too. So update soon!
This was nice, though complicated. And if Alice is opening the big black bag marked “Lenore”, your story could go on for a while yet (not that I’m complaining about that). I think the answer to Dana’s “Am I seeing anyone?” question is “Well, I’m not not seeing anyone” isn’t it? Oh, and I loved it even more that you managed to get a dog park into the story.
Not what I was expecting at all but totally excellent!!!!! It really is two steps forward, one step back for these two. Am beginning to seriously feel for Dana in all of this – come on Alice have some faith!!!!!!!!!! Looking forward to next Monday already (and that is not a sentence I thought I would ever utter.)