This can’t happen to me. I’ve waiting for too long and now someone, a girl, is moving in on Spencer. All just because I was to chicken to tell her how I feel. I have kept it inside for years, and I feel like I’m about to explode any day now. And today might just be the day. I want to break something. I want to scream. I want to let loose. No, what I really want to do is…. cry. Not being able to hold it in any longer, I head to straight to my car instead of my second period. Walking fast and breathing hard, I breeze a loner roaming the halls.

"Ashley?" The person calls out.

Fighting the urge to just keep walking, I turn around. "Mads?"

"Hey." She smiles. "Where are you going?"

Shit. I’m caught. "Um-"

"Somehow I get the feeling….. your skipping. Wow. That’s so unlike you." And it’s true. She knows me too well.

"Look, I’m just having an off day. I need to think."

"Why think alone? I’ll go with you. If you want, that is." Hmm lets see. If she goes I’m bound to spill and if she doesn’t I’m going to get that look puppy dog face from her. What to pick…

Taking yet another big breath, I make my decision. "Ok Madison. Lets get out of here."

"Ok. Sure. Spill."

I fell myself start to sweat. I have hid this for so long and now I’m finally going to tell someone. Maybe not who I wanted it to be, but it’s a start. I avert my eyes to my hands and watch myself fidle with them. Ok. Deep breaths. In and out. In and out. Eww that’s gross. Damn, I have a dirty mind. My whole body is burning up. This isn’t going to be easy. But, nothing is easy anymore. Not in my life. Taking my millionth deep breath of the day, I figure I should just get this over with.

"Ok, so…" I think my about how I’m going to say this and continue. "You know Spencer, right?"

"Yeah." My best friend scrunches her eyebrows in confusion.

"Well ever since like, the 5th grade," I pause. "I’ve had the hugest crush on her."  Swallowing the lump in my throat, I gaze up at her. I expected to see shock, but I saw…. dissapointment. Hurt. She stayed silent for atleast five minutes before she spoke.

"Wow. I really wasn’t expecting that."

"Believe me, I wasn’t planning on tell you either."

"Wow, Ash. That’s- wow."

"Could you say something else?"

"Uhh well," She sends a small smirk my way. "You’ve got great taste in women."

I smile. "Oh Mads." Earning a giggle from her, I place my hand atop her’s. "Thank you. I don’t know why I never told you. I always thought that you were going to be grossed out and leave me."

She quickly pulls her hand away from mine. She is so confusing lately. Looking down, she grins. " I would never leave you."

"I know that now." I reflect her grin.

"We should get back to school."

"Why?"

She laughs. "To get back before lunch, so you can see your beloved."

"Good thinking." I joke, making us both chuckle.