Bette had lingered on the couch for a long time after Tina had left, trying to capture her essence with all of her senses. Unfortunately, Tinas fragrance was already beginning to fade and the contours of the couch were returning to their normal shape. Bette traced her lips with her fingers, remembering their first gentle kiss, in such a long time. She had wanted so much to really kiss Tina, but, out of fear, let Tina have control. At that moment, there was a knock on the door. It was Fed Ex, delivering a package for Tina Kinnard. Bette accepted it, it looked like a CD and had an open card with it. Dear Tina, heres the music you wanted for Bettes surprise party, hope all goes well, Brian. P.S. #4 – Great Song! Take care. What party, Bette thought? She looked over the CD, she recognized some of the songs. 1) Heaven – DJ Sammy 2) All I have – Beth Neilson Chapman 3) Blessed – Christina Aguilera, but it was #4) that was new – So you are to me – EastMountainSouth. Curiousity got the better of her, she placed the CD in the stereo. As the music, at the banquet, As the wine, before the meal, as the firelight in the night, so are you to me. As the ruby in the setting, as the fruit upon the tree, as the wind blows over the plains, so are you to me Violins playing in the background Bette just sat there, taken aback. The woman sang with such love in her voice, such sincerity, such certainty – these were Tinas feelings for her – were – stuck in Bettes mind. As Tina was making this CD for her, what the ***** had she been doing with Candace? Betraying the Love of her Life. Bettes stomach started to knot up again and she just listened to the song over and over – each time, crying a little bit more. Meanwhile, Tina was home, pacing, confused with so many different feelings inside her, being torn between what her mind was saying and what her heart was feeling. She needed to make a decision, to just make up her mind and do it. She knew she needed to tell Bette, it would be hard for Bette to hear and to understand, but Tina felt compelled to take this step. Tina called, Hi Bette, I need to talk to you Bette – Ok, do you want to come over? Tina said Sure Bette I got your CD today from Fed Ex Tina Oh, I had forgotten, did you play it? Bette Yes, I did, Tina, the music is so beautiful and so telling Tina Yes, I picked out the songs to play for you, I was going to throw you a party to celebrate your success at the museum, then, a long period of silence, Bette I know Tina You are always accusing me of being so practical, I wanted to do something special to show you how much I loved you. Out of the whole sentence, it was loved, in the past tense that stayed in Bettes mind. Tina Anyway, Ill be right over Bette ok. When Tina arrived, Bette could feel how tense she was. Bette Tina, whats wrong? Tina Bette, I want to tell you something, please sit down. Bette Tina, are you ok? Tina Im fine – I just have some news and I need to tell you Bette Im listening Tina Since I left here, Ive been looking for work and I got a call the other day from my old boss, who wants me to do some consulting Bette Thats great, Tina, congratulations Tina Bette, he wants me to consult on a project from the ground up, in Chicago Bette Chicago? How long will you be gone? Tina About 3 months, 6 weeks at first to put everything into motion, then, a couple of follow up visits – about a month each Bette just sat there stunned – not knowing what to say. She always had a hard time when Tina would leave, and thats when they were really close. But, now, when things were so shaky between them, she was petrified that maybe she wouldnt see Tina ever again. Tina Bette, are you ok? Bette sure Tina I think this is a good opportunity for me, Bette, I need to put some space between us. Its been really hard for me to figure out how I feel and what I want. Im really confused right now. Please tell me what youre thinking Bette I guess Im just really afraid that if you leave, I may never see you again – that you will learn to live without me – maybe even be happier Tina I dont know whats going to happen, I just need to get away and be on my own for a while Bette ok, Tina, I understand Bette hadnt moved, her tears, never seemed to end, but she tried to hold it together. She knew Tina needed to do this. Bette Tina, can I ask you for one thing, please? Tina what Bette will you dance with me, to the music you mad for me? Tina was hesitant, but she could see and feel all Bettes pain, and it wasnt like Bette to ask for anything. Tina also knew it would be a long time before she saw her again, and wanted to do this for her and herself. They both stood up, the music played and the dance begain politely, almost formal. After a while, Tina felt Bettes arms reach around her and hold her close – this time it was Tinas neck that felt the stream of Bettes tears, which only made Tina hold her tighter. Bette cried quietly, they danced slowly together. This wasnt how Tina had envisioned their dance, both of them in so much pain, but it was their present reality. Bette began to feel weak and light headed, she slid from Tinas embrace, sitting on the floor – just staring, tears continuing to fall. Tina sat close to her. She took Bettes hands, which were trembling, holding them between her own. Tina then held Bettes face in her hands and wiped away her tears. Slowly, Tina reached in to kiss her, tasting her lips, as well as her tears. Tina then gently pushed her tongue into Bettes mouth, a place she hadnt been for so long. Bette, whose kisses were once always so strong, passionate and possessive, now felt delicate and fragile. Tina was afraid to kiss her too hard, for fear she would break. Bette clung to Tina now, kissing her back with as much energy as she could, which wasnt much. At the same time that Tina was feeling all of Bettes weakness, Bette was feeling all of Tinas strength. The strength of her kiss, her embrace, the love she once had and lost. Bette was in amazement of this woman, and felt so lucky just to be with her. As they were sitting together and the music played, both realized it was getting late, Tilna would soon be leaving. Bette had no idea when she would see her again, so she did not want to miss this opportunity to tell her how she felt. Bette Tina, I want you to know that I never knew how much I loved you, how much I needed you until this time that we have spent apart. I dont think I ever really appreciated all that you Love gave me – a sense of oneness with you, a sense of belonging, all the joy that I felt being with you, and, finally, all the Love, physical, emotional and spiritual. And, if ever, I am given a chance to be with you again, I will cherish all the moments I spend with you, because now I know the emptiness and lonliness of being without you and your love. Tina, I Love you, I always will, you have my heart Tina was speechless, Bette was always very expressive, physically, but emotionally, it was hard for her to verbalize her feelings. But Tina knew that Bette meant every word of what she said. When Tina was leaving, she held Bette close and whispered, Bette, I love you too. With that Bette watched Tina slowly disappear into the night shadows.