Fan Fiction
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Journeys – Searching – Chapter 2
(In the car, Alice’s little car, Alice was in the driver’s seat, both literally and figuratively. Bette allowed her to lead, she was too tired to do most anything else. She looked out the car window, like she had earlier that day in her office. There she was for a second time on that landmark day- a gaze out a window, an emptiness, a numbness, and feeling like an emptying glass of wine into which its drinker pours water so that the drink is desparately replenished, when really there’s no more substance. And this is the exhaustion with which she had faced her daily existence this past, long whilehow did she survive for so long, she pondered. Alice was rightshe was, in a way, so glad it was over. She had been doing so well in the beginning. But she kept going with a veracity that soon turned into a force to which she became enslaved. There was no balance between her work and her life and eventually her work, in which she had taken such pride, began to suffer and, in turn, she suffered the consequences. It seemed so silly in a way- this couldn’t possibly defeat her, she thought to herself as she recollected Alice’s lectures above not drowning herself in her work. She knew there was more to her state of affairs, but she wouldn’t allow herself to entertain those painful thoughts.)
ALICE- “Ok, we’re here. Let’s go. ”
BETTE- “Yeah ok, let’s go. I could really use a martini.”
ALICE- “I dunno Bafter that concoction you were drinking back there I think maybe you should have some Planet coffee before embarking on an alcoholic adventureyou know?”
BETTE- “Don’t be silly, I can hold my liquor. ”
ALICE- (She was about to say something but then held backnow was not the time to remind her old friend of the not so distant past.) “Okat least we’ll all be there to hold you up when can’t walk straight! Let’s go. ”
(Bette smurks and they both head for the front entrance. Music was emanating from their favourite place and a steady stream of patrons circulated. They looked around and finally spotted their group at a table. Alice made eye contact with Shane and then Shane saw Bette. Shane’s eyes were smiling- Bette was someone she admired and cared for and it was always so comforting to witness her success; it was hard to witness Bette falter as she had so much recently.)
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(20 votes, average: 4.35 out of 5)
the format is still the same, just a huge block of text…but the story is definately interesting and progressing
Yeah, the story is interesting, although it’s a bit difficult to read. Maybe you could put double enter after a paragraph.
Interesting story. Looking forward to more.
Quotation marks are your friends. The ‘Enter’ or ‘Return’ key are pinky pals. Good story, but too damn hard to read. The last place I wanna read a textbook is online. More white space between character dialog and paragraphs will make this all better.
Like this story alot
Format still the same, but the story is very interesting…please continue.
got me hooked!!