Chapter 13

Carmen looked sideways at Shane. She didn’t know why she had asked her but Shane had explained that Alice and Dana were inseparable, Jenny had her writing class and Tina and Bette were having a rough time. Besides, she said she didn’t want them to get their hopes too high. In case it didn’t turn well, they need not know and they wouldn’t be disappointed either. When Carmen heard that, she thought Shane was referring to herself.

So now they were in Trenton, New Jersey. Shane took a cigarette out and then jammed it back into the cigarette pack. She had been like this the entire time inside the eatery. Jerky hand movements, shifting in her seat. When any middle-aged woman came in, she would sit upright and when she saw that she was not heading to this direction, she would slump right back and take a drink of her coffee. Five espressos. Carmen had kept quiet all this while. She didn’t know what to say and besides, Shane was so nervous and on edge, she was afraid of saying the wrong thing.

Carmen watch Shane’s head turn towards a woman dressed in a white top and purple cardigan and beige pants. The woman looked right at their table and started walking towards them. This was her. Shane’s mother. Carmen couldn’t take her eyes off her. It was as though she had known her from somewhere. Then she realised it was the eyes. Those virid green eyes that seemed to mirror Shane’s. Carmen could feel her own breath hitch and she reached over and squeezed Shane’s thigh. “I’m Josephine Keller,”

“I’m Carmen, Shane’s friend,” Carmen said. Shane stood up and nearly knocked over her cup of espresso.

“I’m Shane,” At first she seemed at a loss of what to do. She rubbed her hand on her jeans and extended her hand out. Josephine smiled. Instead she leaned over and hugged Shane. Carmen could see how stunned Shane was at this sudden display of affection. For a moment, her hands looked as though they were suspended in mid-air, then Shane’s hands wrapped around Josephine in a tentative embrace.

“I saw the article about you in Style. You’re doing good for yourself Shane,”

“Yeah Thanks,” Shane looked down at her lap and then glanced up again. “I know this is weird for you, but I’m so glad to know you’re doing well. Maybe you won’t believe it but I have been thinking about you…Oh yes….I bought this with me..” Josephine looked through the contents of her bag and took out a photograph that was yellow with age. “That is Shane, at four,” Carmen looked at the picture. Shane’s head was cropped short and shaggy. There was a smudge of dirt on her cheek and she was dressed in a frock two sizes too big.

She could see Shane looking at the picture and when Shane looked at Josephine, there was so much anger, pain and disappointment in her eyes. “So tell me Josephine, why did you leave me?”