Pyromance 9

The tiles are cold. They are black and white. Carmen was sick for an hour. I rubbed her back and told her it would be ok. She leaned against the claw foot tub and stared at the ceiling. She was very upset. She seemed to be confused. I knew her confusion. I knew that feeling of abandonment that comes from someone you love leaving you with little to no explanation. I know how she felt but I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want anyone saying anything to me when mom killed herself and Carmen didn’t either.

I stuck out my hand and she grabbed it. I walked her over to the sink and poured her some mouthwash. She went through the routine. The wash and the rinse. She looked at herself for a long time in the mirror and then she cried. Heartbreaking to hear her cry. She reached for me and I hugged her. I let her cry and held her close.

Time just kind of vanished. I was not sure how long we stood there. At some point she just stopped and let out this long painful sigh that signaled her body was too tired to continue. I took her hand in mine and walked her over to the bed. I pulled the sheets back she put her head down on the pillow. Stretching her legs out under the sheets as I closed the curtains and shut out the world. I turned all the lights outs and joined her. I didn’t get under the sheets with her. She turned over to me eyes big and red and she said thank you.

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For understanding, for not saying anything. For being here when I needed you.”

“Don’t think about it. Just rest. I will be here in the morning. Sleep…”

“Shane…….”

“Yeah?”

“I am all alone….Bruce was I had left. My family died in a car wreck……”

“I know……but you don’t have to be. I am not going anywhere….just sleep…..and maybe it will be better tomorrow.”