’’What’s the time’’ I asked

’’Just after 11, I thought I would let you sleep in after you arrived so late, the funerals not til 3, you have plenty of time’’

I stand in the hallway looking at my reflection in the mirror I feel a hand take mine.

’’It’ll be ok, I will be there with you’’ she says

True to her word she is the strength I needed throughout the funeral she never let my hand go sitting beside me in the church. I never want her to let me go again.

We sit up all night talking about anything and everything except the one thing I want to tell her that I am only attracted to women. That I love and wanted to be loved in return by her. At times I almost feel her wanting me to say it, instead I don’t. I decide actions are better than words as she’s about to say goodnight, taking her hand in mine pulling her towards me I lean in kissing her gently on the lips, she doesn’t pull back. She returns my kiss, our lips softly exploring each other presence wanting to savor every first experience of each other. She parts her lips as our tongues met in a courtship ritual dancing around each other nervously at first then more intense as the rhythm sets in of the dance, I am swept away to somewhere I had only dared dream about. I want more much more but only if she wants it too I’m not going to do anything she doesn’t want, with her free of any regrets tomorrow.

Slowly undoing the buttons one by one I slip my hand inside her dress, tracing the delicate lace pattern of the bra, opening her dress fully, cupping her breasts in my hands. My thumbs following the outline of her nipples which have now erected commanding my attention through the flower petals. Just as they had in front of the fire, except this time I could touch. I bite gently on the nipple teasing my tongue through the gaps in the lace. I slide the dress from her shoulders as I move up to kiss her neck with soft butterfly kisses I work my way down her shoulder sliding off the bra strap.