CHAPTER 14:

WHAT IS SWITZERLAND, ANYWAYS?

Putting the small pill in my mouth, I took a large sip of water. The pill almost seemed to disappear down my throat as I barely swallowed. It had been days since Jacob began to continue visiting us to check up. I had told Carlisle about my dream, and the real reason why I blacked out in the shower.

“Have you had any since then?” He had asked, concerned.

“Every night. I’ve gotten so used to it now that they don’t bother me,” Was my quiet reply. I was prescribed a pill to keep those dreams away. I had to take one every night before bed, and that would rid me of my nightmares. But the memory of it still haunted me.

The Cullens were overall happy to see Jacob as the pleasant protector. Except Rosalie, who still hated Jacob with a burning passion. She kept her distance, though, to my relief. Emmett followed suit, giving Rosalie whatever she wanted. Jasper remained persistent on using his power on himself, while Alice looked into the future, not seeing anything. We knew she couldn’t see anything involving the werewolf pack, but she tried nonetheless. Some nights she would become very frustrated with herself, and would have to go out to punch trees down to get her anger out.

I slipped between the covers and felt the icy chill beside me. Edward held me as I tried to go to sleep, ready for a fresh new day. We had made it through this one. Let’s see if we could make it through another. I had been living day by day, not worrying about the next. Edward worried about the mentality I was getting into, afraid I was setting myself up for a melt down, but I would just laugh and tell him not to be such a worrywart.

As I fell to sleep, I thought of Jacob, who was probably circling the house, still in his human form. He hadn’t phased in Heaven knows how long, but we all knew if he did, his thoughts could slip, and then the whole pack would know, were they to be phased as well, that he was trying to help protect us. I wondered what it would be like if I were on the pack’s side. Would Jacob still care to help out the vampire team? Then I thought, am I really team Switzerland after all? What is team Switzerland anyway? Was I just on it to save myself, or did I really care about both sides? Of course I cared about both sides. But if I equally cared about both sides, would I have chosen Edward? Wouldn’t I have stayed single? And now that war was declared, didn’t I HATE the pack? My spiral of thoughts made me toss and turn, until Edward finally took hold of me.