Spencer determined that the doctors were full of shit.

Spencer was told that they had caught the man; they had got him when they had found her. He killed himself while awaiting sentence in prison.

Spencer remembered a couple months after she was released from the hospital. She was back at her small town home. He parents and brothers living there with her. They never gave her a second of peace. Paula couldn’t bare leaving her little girl, and she couldn’t bare living in that apartment. The apartment she had found one baby gone and the other mercilessly murdered on the floor.

Spencer was scared and everywhere she looked, there was a memory of what happened. Her parents, her brother, the whole town carried a piece of the memory and she couldn’t stand it at all.

She made her decision one winter day. She sat at the top of the ice cold slide, and the childish playground haunted her. She kept seeing him there, even though she knew he was dead, she kept seeing him standing at the bottom of the slide. She couldn’t be here anymore. She couldn’t deal with it.

She went to her parents and told them she was leaving. They refused to let her go.

[i] I have to leave! [/i] She had yelled and then turned it around on them, [i] Maybe if you fucking looked for me then I wouldn’t be fucked up like this! [/i]

That hit both of her parents in the heart. Her brother’s watching from a distance. The anger, hurt, and negative in the girl lashing out at the family…

Spencer pulled herself away from those thoughts. She found herself frightened and shaking. She could feel her eyes gloss, but there was no tears spilling. She could not cry.

Instead, the girl whipped her head around the plush room and took a deep breath. Her body was shaking with fear. She hurried and closed out of myspace before standing up. She walked out of the room through Amalia’s and down the hallway to the lighted living room. She needed to be in the light. She needed to see what was around her.

She stopped at the threshold. Ashley was sitting up against the couch with her head in her hands and ear buds in her ears. Spencer could hear the loud music from where she stood. The young rocker didn’t look like she always looked; cold, distant, and a bitch. She looked like a regular teenage girl…who was typically hurting.