“Yeah, well… you nearly lost me for good earlier, but you redeemed yourself,” she winked.  “I have every faith in you Ashley, and you should too.”

“So what do we do now?” I asked, genuinely clueless as to what we were supposed to do after our little outpouring of emotions.  I didn’t do relationships, I didn’t do serious connections with people, I didn’t open up about things, and I certainly didn’t believe in mahogany, or monogamy, or whatever.  That’s how clueless I was!  But with Spencer it was different, and I knew that if I embarked on something huge with her, then everything would change.  I just didn’t know if I was ready for that.

“Well, what do you want to do?” she asked me, staring deep into my eyes again, searching for answers like only she was capable of doing.  I hoped she didn’t see my immediate reaction – the innate voice that responded in the same way whenever I was attracted to a hot girl.  Hit and run, fuck and go, have fun and get the hell out of there.  But as I had already realised, Spencer wasn’t like other girls, and I had every intention of being there the morning after.  In fact I surprised myself by how much I wanted to wake up with her.

But I knew I was getting ahead of myself.  I knew Spencer, and I knew she wasn’t going to jump headfirst into anything, let alone sleeping with me immediately after we had admitted how we felt – hell, we weren’t even together yet!

“I don’t know,” I sighed. “I don’t know what I want.”

“Well, do you want me?” she asked, her voice rising slightly as if she were getting worried I was about to reject her.  I stepped forward and placed my hands reassuringly on her arms, stroking them gently up and down as I held her gaze.

“More than anything,” I told her.  A smile crept its way onto my lips, quickly mirrored by Spence.

“Then, do you wanna go out with me?” she asked uncertainly.

“Is that an official question?” I winked.  She laughed and playfully pushed me away as her cheeks blushed a shade of red I’d never seen before.  She looked down, embarrassed.

“Maybe,” she said coyly.

“Well you’re gonna have to sound a bit more sure than that if you wanna be convincing,” I laughed, reaching back out towards her and finally pulling her into my arms.

“You’re an ass,” she smiled, looking up at me.

“You love it,” I grinned.

The playful tone suddenly turned serious as silence fell between us and we watched each other intently.  Even the noise from the party wasn’t enough to burst the little bubble of peace that had formed itself around us.  We just held each other, staring at each other, comfortable in each other’s company and gaze.  Never before had a moment felt so relaxed and yet so exciting and intense at the same time.  The chemistry we shared was exhilarating, and I’d never before felt so strongly and passionately about someone whilst not in the throes of sex.  Just the touch of her hand as it found mine, and how her fingers lightly played with my hair was enough to force me into action.

“Spence, would you like to go out with me?” I asked.