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A Life I Never Meant Chapter Twenty One
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I can hear the distance hustle of a group of people all moving in the same direction at once. This is it, this is the moment where I am going to see her and talk to her. My eyes scan the room, waiting and watching. Then I see her and my mind goes blank while my heart skips a beat. She’s still so beautiful, it’s the same blonde hair and bright hazel eyes that inspired so many carnal thoughts over the years, and yet I can see where time has changed her. Where I have changed her.
I watch as her eyes search for me. I move forward and say her name. It’s barely above a whisper and yet she looks to the place where I am standing. The beginnings of a smile play at the corner of her lips, and then it falls away as her shoulders slump slightly. I can almost see the weight of the world on her shoulders as this happens. I creep forward, one step closer.
“Tina.” I say, words failing me when I need them the most.
“Bette.” she replies, and I’m glad it’s not just me having trouble finding the right thing to say.
“I…I just wanted to start by saying…how was your flight?” I say, shrugging my shoulders.
“Long, but I finally got some sleep, of a fashion.” she replies, knowing that wasn’t what I wanted to say at all, but letting it go.
I inch forward a pace more. Right now I really am within touching distance. I can feel my right hand moving towards her arm. I just need to feel that human contact, and just as I’m about to she takes a decisive step backwards.
“I can’t Bette.”
“What?” I ask, gently.
“Have you touch me.”
“Why?” I say, knowing that she can see the hurt in my eyes.
“It’s not what you’re thinking. I’ve just about got it under control, but when someone touches me…I want to…I’m not ready for those kind of emotions.
I withdraw my arm that seems to have been suspended in midair. I look at her closely, trying to read what she is thinking, except right now I have no idea, I couldn’t even begin to guess.
“Sorry.” I mumble, thinking that this isn’t a very good start.
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Great chapter, I got a little heartbroken when Tee refused Bette touch her, a little bit tears when they talked about Shane. I only can pray and hope this story will end up TiBette together, because I am so hooked by your wonderful writing and storyline.
yes! they finally meet! another great chapter!! you’re spectacularly brilliant!! love your story!! cant wait for more!!
This is sooooooooo sad, but slow torture with Bette & Tina, Please please please please make them come together
Such sadness in their words, but soo well written. I’m a lil bummed after reading it but not sorry that I did. Thanks again for taking the time.
the pain and sadness in this story is so intense – I finished the story and found I had been holding my breath – you have me identifying with both of these women – your writing makes these women totally alive and real – AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME and hard too.
City, I can’t remember the name of the story, but it totally broke my heart. Please don’t tell me you are going to do the same :(. I should just stop reading to preserve my battered TiBette heart, but your writing is so magnificent, it just sucks me in and I’m powerless to resist. Thank you for posting, you are truly talented.
my morning is better now..thank you for the post and I trust you will be kind to our tibette hearts…post soon
ok first it was sad with shane but with them together now and this seems more heartbreaking
1st, brb !!!!
It’s called After the Fall by spartajones. I love it too.
I can’t even comment on B&T really. I’m still trying to deal with you killing off Shane. D=
I don’t understand Tina not wanting to hug Bette at the aiport. For someone that can read Bette and knows that she is going through alot right now she could not even do a fucking hug? TIna is even more of a mess! If you are going in the direction of Spartajones’s story then I am very happy except the part where Bette is still pining away for Tina, that I can do without. For except two characters one includes Bette I just want them to be happy damn all the rest of them.
Yes Sparta’s story was well written but I was in anguish. I hope this story has a happy ending, meaning I want them to be together no matter how rocky the journey is as long as the end is B&T together. Everytime I see your post my heart is in my throat cause it’s on the fence either way. I love your writing. Please post soon.
From the beginning of this story there has been this underlying current of sadness that is so powerful that most times I am left reft of words to comment on this story. I don’t know city when I think about my relationships and experiences I wonder if I have ever loved anyone enough to even bother to seek closure. Or if I have loved anyone enough to uberhaupt need closure? Yeah I read that story by Sparta bitter pill that one but I read it because it was well written and not over dramatized. Besides everyone was ok in the end. This story is heartfelt and deep. You already know how I feel and I am eager to find out what your feelings will lead to. Thanks
hope that Shane’s death was the last sad event in this story. Love your writing!! Post soon !!!!
aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh I breathe again….but I’m with Lament, I still haven’t forgiven you for Shane….and as for Tina, in denial!!!!!!
Loved having B/T together in this chapter even though they were uncomfortable. I’m hopeful you’ll have them work this through. I read most of “After the Fall”, but when I heard they didn’t end up together, I had to stop reading. I’ve enjoyed your stories. Thanks for writing!
Well, that was awkward. I suppose it had to be. I’ll be interested to see how they interact after getting some sleep and this first meeting out of the way.
I’m thinking about the same things as Bette….I truly hope this story has a happy end, this has been so sad up to now. Post soon….
You know i dont know how much more pain a person can take it because right now i think Bette is on the edge and just think that Tina can hurt her even more it really sucks. I still cant believe that Shane is dead :(
I will be broken if Tibette parts here, too, but I love your story, and I guess the heartbreak will just have to be sweet.
It was “After The Fall” by spartajones. It was an excellent fanfic. But strangely, the author was never heard from again. ;-) But she had Bette involved w/a past lover (Latina) who had gazillions of dollars and strong personality who most readers would feel was worthy of Bette’s love. It was a bit fantastical. I was left happy for Bette b/c Teddy was such an improvement over Tina. Your story is so very personal, raw and realistic with both main characters being in a fragile state. That’s why some readers (me included) fear for Bette. Your story is clearly written not bumbling about which also, in some weird way, makes me worry for Bette.
What a good chapter. I didn’t want it to end.
You write it all so well – this story make my heart pound!
Hey C-gal, I am balling my eyes out at that chapter. Tears just flowed unlike Bette’s which just stayed there ready to fall but held back by some invisible force. Bette and Tnia’s lack of phsyical connection was heartbreaking and only serves to compound Tina’s still evident but deeply buried attraction and connection to Bette. I do hope that this tragedy brings these gals back tonight and allow them to deal with all the hurt of the past and move forward into the fresh, new light of day. Sparta’s story was spectacular and the first one that really got me hooked on this site. I, too, wish for a TiBette union and not a TiAlly one. Please make my dream come true. Thank you for this torturous tale of sorrow and woe which I know will become their salvation. Your Loyal Fan.
Your writing is awesome girl. As the other readers said i too hope that there will be no sadness in the future for tibette hearts. ^_^
Your story conveys the feeling that they have a love for each other that transcends all earthly connections, much like Oprah and Gayle (just kidding!) Really, I feel the love, and while it may not mean they will be together in a romantic sense, this connection is too important to let go. I’m glad they’ve found a way back to each other. Yoda’s wisdom is transcendental, her power extending even beyond the grave! …I don’t know if I like you referencing anti B&T fics, though they were undoubtedly good. Is that forshadowing, hinting, hummm?? ..Another good one was “Ashes, Ashes” by Fanficchick. Check it out! “After Loving You” by Pancha will break your heart. Lastkid had a good one with Bette and Courtney, but it’s been taken down. …I will continue to read this one with interest and an overtone of melancholy. Hey, sad can be good. It certainly is in this case! I hope they can get to the other side. Thanks!
Can’t wait to read what’s next. Thanks.