“Tonya!” She stood up, pasting a smile on her face, “how about a drink?”  Tonya gave Tina a tight-lipped grin, and continued her steady walk on her way toward Dana, who was now standing shoulder to shoulder with Alice, head tilted, listening to her friend.  Tina grabbed Tonya’s arm and spun her around, giving her a slight bear hug and pulling her toward the bar.  “C’mon, Tonya, you always know the best exotic drinks.  I’m up for something different.  How about you?”

            Tonya heaved a sigh and allowed herself to be dragged to the bar.  As peevish as Dana was with her these days, she certainly didn’t want to provoke her now.  She knew she was on thin ice with the tennis star, and she had yet to establish a line of retreat that would afford her anything like what Dana’s fame and money could give her. 

            “Sure, why not?” she reluctantly agreed, forced herself into a casual grin, and snapped her fingers at the bartender.  “Two Incredible Hulks,” she ordered, “I assume you have Hennessy?”

            “Yes ma’am,” the bartender nodded, made the drinks with admirable efficiency, and set them down in front of the two women.

            Tonya glanced over at Dana and Alice again with an unhappy look, felt her eyes beginning to tear.  She wrapped her hand tightly around the glass and took a long deep drink.  “I need to visit the powder room,” she gave Tina a wan smile.  “Watch my drink?”

            “Sure,” Tina nodded, turned and leaned with her back against the bar as Tonya walked a little too quickly away.  Then she stood up and began sweeping the room again with her eyes, looking for Shane.

***** 

Relentless

2.11.05

Janet Marie

You need to be

Just like me

In ever way

Shape

And form

This way

I’ll never be alone

There is no better life

Time you accept that

Know your place

By my side

You don’t have to believe in me

Just know that you will

You can be afraid

Just never be ashamed

You are who I tell you to be

You might not believe a word I say

But you’ll do it all anyway

No matter where you go

What fork in the road you take

It leads right back here

By my side

Don’t try and find a better life

There is none

u are who I want you to be

A shadowy version of me