I reached out and placed my hand on the side of her face. “Why aren’t you happy for me?”

“I am happy for you girl. I just…don’t know.”

I was confused. What didn’t she know? I turned and began to walk away.

“Keep your head up baby girl, and confirm your pregnancy to Helena.”

I couldn’t hear the rest as I continued to walk away. Keep my head up? What did she mean by that? Regardless I knew I had to find Helena. We were having a baby.

I opened the doors to our chambers. Helena was quietly sitting on the couch deep in thought.

“Baby” I announced.

She didn’t look up. I knew she had heard me. It seemed the one thing that always kept her mind was her sister. It was getting old. Really old. I knew how to get her attention.  It was only in the bedroom and she showered me with gifts. I just couldn’t understand what the big deal was.

I stood in front of her. “Baby” I announced once again.

This time she looked into my eyes. I walked over to her and grabbed her hand. I placed it on my stomach and looked deeply into her eyes.

A tear ran down Helena’s face and she smiled deeply.

We made love that night.

What surprised me was that I didn’t think of Bette during our love making.

 I woke up startled. In my mind I was screaming. I didn’t understand. This women; Bette haunted me. In every way but mostly when I was with Helena. I needed to talk to Carmen. Bette was haunting me. I just couldn’t live like this. I was having Helena’s child after all. She was my wife and mattered to me. What Helena and I shared had more meaning than a one night stand.

I couldn’t help but regret that night. With the beautiful brunette that kissed me deeply and looked deep into my eyes and kissed my soul. Something about her stuck with me. I felt this ache in me that could only have been satisfied by her. What scared me was that simple thought. I needed somebody else. It didn’t matter what Helena did.

I had no other option but to die with this secret. My body craved the brunette with the full lips and soulful eyes. The women that held my dreams hostage. She was my little secret.

TBC