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    Blind (Chap 19)

     

    Then… if Bette has someone exclusive in her life, how come during my whole stay here she was with us all the time? Doesn’t she need to spend sometime with her boyfriend as well?

     

    To get the answer to my question is from the source… Tina…

     

    “I think your sister is gay…” I sat on Tina’s bed when she’s surfing the Internet with her back to me… I want to see her reaction. Oh my gosh… to my horror, she seems tense.

     

    “What make you think so?” She questions it to me with a slight turn of her head… then she quickly turns back to her notebook when I was piercing my stares into her eyes to try to read into her.

     

    “She hasn’t gone out on date with any guy and the friends she is hanging out with all the time are girls… your father is also worried about her.” I have to convince her about this lie and see what I can get from this…

     

    “Ma… you’re just overreacting… Kelly is just… well she has yet met someone she really likes at the moment. Give her time, she’s still so young.”

     

    “But unlike you, you’ve dated guys when you were in her age.”

     

    ‘I was just so dumb to have been avoiding the real true me… had been so scared to hurt my ma…so had to date those guys to seek cover… to seek an accurate answer… but now only I found my ultimate answer… my answer is Bette…’ Tina thinks.

     

    “Ma, I’m really regretting to have dated those guys… I’d rather Kelly won’t be regretting like me now…”

     

    ‘What does she mean she’s regretting to have dated those guys… has she been…like girls all the time? No…my Tina was not gay…and could not be gay… what did I do wrong?’

     

    “I’m really looking forward to see you bring home a decent young guy and settle down…”

     

    Tina’s heart twitches with shame and guilt… for she cannot help herself for not have feelings for guys. Her heart breaks too for not able to make her ma proud and achieve her ma’s dreams and expectation in ‘that field’.

     

    She force a smile to her ma then turn back to her notebook… she is too scared to continue this conversation anymore. At this lowest mood, she’s aching to be pulled into a warm and tight hug and be held by a particular brunette that will sure help erasing all her pain.

     

    Behind Tina, in silence… Martha decides to put this matter off aside… she’s going back to Carolina on the next day, fighting and distressing over the matter that Tina has not even admitted to her face is not a good thing as she don’t want to loose her daughter… she thought she has gained another daughter when she met Bette the first time, after seeing the interactions between her daughter and her friend, she feels like she has… loose her Tina…

    TBC

     

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    Comments

    1. Wow for me that was very heavy. My mom must have been thinking all those thoughts when my ex lived with me.I was not out and she was.My mom is very ignorant and will never except me for who I am. Her only thought is that I failed her as a daughter.I think that being gay will never be fully excepted!PPS

    2. I know that Tina is heart broken about not being able to tell her mother about Bette being her woman. Sometimes parents will not make life miserable but in most cases parents cause even more trama to the children.

    3. This started out all positive when it said “Martha had a little tingle in her heart to see the interaction between her eldest daughter and the brunette” then it went downhill so fast. It’s like she went from delight to disgust….dag Martha get a grip…did she notice how HAPPY Tina was? That should be what is important. I still say Kelly is gay…put that in your pipe Martha…lol

    4. Ouch. =/ I’d love to sit here and say it’s no big deal. So what that Bette isn’t just Tina’s really good friend? But it’s not easy to see it that way. Shoot I still have moments of brief shock when I see two men or two women together. It’s not the default setting for couples. Plus, where I live (I’m in the States but a pretty rednecky part of it lol) it’s just not seen. I know my parents never imagined I’d be with a woman instead of a man so I don’t expect everything to be cake and pie the first time I take a woman to meet my parents. They won’t be assholes as they love and accept me, but they won’t be begging to see us making out or anything. lol

    5. Eh-oh… The mother thinks she has done something wrong… :S I also found out that a mother finds it hard to see her daughter with a woman, Ive always thought it might have something to do with the fact that a mother always counts on being the most important WOMAN in her daughters life and now she can’t… yes I do remember our conversation about the mom’s… Parents, they are a special race arent they? LOL! Thank you my friend for this wonderfull chapter!

    6. Zabo – your story is always a plesure to read and I want to read more of it – thank you :O). Now this is a bit topic you have brought up in your story…how is Tina going to get out of this one!!!!!! ohhh do post soon and happy holidays

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