The setting is an unnamed bar in Los Angeles. Tracy takes a seat at the piano while Angus has his guitar ready.

Angus: Ready? A-one and a-two…

Tim, Henry and Benjamin (at left of the bar): This isn’t real life. This is just fantasy…

Mark, Gomey and Gene (at right of the bar): Caught in a strange script…

Tim, Henry and Benjamin: With no escape to reality…

Mark, Gomey and Gene: Open your eyes…a word to the wise…

Mark, Gomey, Gene, Henry and Benjamin: …You’ll seeeeee…

Tim: I have a penis. I get no sympathy.

Henry and Benjamin: Because we’re easy come…

Gomey and Gene: Easy go.

Henry and Benjamin: Could have died…

Gomey and Gene: No one knows.

Mark: Anyway, the guys blow.

Mark, Gomey, Gene, Henry and Benjamin: Does it really matter to youuuu?

Tim: To youuuu?

Dylan takes a seat at the bar while Tracy plays the piano.

Dylan: Hello. I disappeared. Put my stuff into a car. Dropped a tape off, then drove far. Oh well. Life had just begunnnnnn. But then I went and sued it all awaaaay. Moronnnnnnnnn!!! Ooooooo ooooo…

Papi (tending bar): Guess the girls can blow, too.

Dylan: Didn’t mean to live a lie! If I’m not back by the end of the series…carry onnnn…carry onnn… My story didn’t matterrr…

Tracy continues playing piano while Tim offers a pat on Dylan’s shoulder. Taking seats next to Dylan are Lara and Carmen.

Lara: Too late!

Carmen: Our time had come.

Lara: I had to fly alone.

Carmen: While I just stayed locked at home.

Lara: San Francisco’s where I went.

Carmen: And I had to go.

Lara and Carmen: Had to leave them all behind and face limbo…!

Carmen: Laraaaa!

Lara: Carmen, oooo…

Papi: This is getting real weird.

Lara and Carmen are suddenly joined by Tonya.

Tonya: Dana should not have died! Guess it’s just a real big moot point nowww!!!

Angus with the guitar solo.

Tracy takes over with the piano.

Mark: I have a camera locked into my hands!

Dylan: Really cool! Really cool! I have a camera, too!

Tim and Henry: We had really sexy women ’til they went all gay!

Gomey: Really gay-o!

Benjamin: Really gay-o!

Gomey: Really gay-o!

Benjamin: Really gay-o!

Carmen: And Shane’s a ho!

Paige (at a nearby table): Oohhhh!

Cherie (at the same table): Oohh!

Lacey (at the same table): Oh!

Mark: I used my cameras, nobody likes me.

Carmen and Lara: He used his cameras, recorded everything! Rapey cameras according to Jenny!

Tracy plays the piano.

Mark: Easy come, easy go. Then they let me go!

Henry and Benjamin: And they said NOOOOO and they let us go!

Papi, Tonya, Carmen and Lara: Let us go!

Henry and Benjamin: And they said NOOOOO and they let us go!

Papi, Tonya, Carmen and Lara: Let us go!

Henry and Benjamin: And they said NOOOOO and they let us go!

Papi, Tonya, Carmen and Lara: Let us go!!!

Paige, Cherie and Lacey: Then they let us go!

Tonya and Lara: Let us go!

Gomey and Gene: Then they let us go!

Papi and Carmen: Let us go!

Everyone: No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Tonya: Oh, Dana Fairbanks, Dana Fairbanks!

Lara: Dana Fairbanks was let go!

Everyone: Into the waterfalls, her ashes free…so free…so FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

Angus rocks out on the guitar while everyone begins to nod their heads to the rhythm. Rising from behind the bar is Uta.

Uta: I’m a lesbian vampirologist!

Angus rocks out.

Uta: And I lick and kiss and I bite for fun! Ohhhhhhhhhh, baby! My storyline was crazy! Just had to get out! Had to get right of therrrrre!

Angus continues playing the guitar before finally giving way to the peaceful piano sounds of Tracy.

Everyone: Oooooooooooooooooooooooooo…ooooh yeah. Ooooo yeah!

Angus and Tracy continue playing.

Tim: Nothing really matters. As you plainly see. Nothing really matters. We’re just limbo characters…too baaaaad…

Tracy plays the crowd near the end with Angus peacefully riffing the guitar.

Tim, Mark and Henry: Anyway, this skit blows…

Gonggg