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Breathe– Chapter 17
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Tina nodded her head, fully understanding and agreeing with Bette’s new assessment of her.
As she moved from foster home to foster home, one truth Tina had learned; she was impossible to love. Foster care had burned that message into her heart, so she agreed with Bette and couldn’t blame her in the least.
Tina sighed and leaning heavily on the table stood next to Bette. Defeated, she resisted the urge to rest her hand against her dark curls, instead returning to her chair on the other side of the table.
“Let’s finish this,” Tina said quietly, not talking about the interview.
Bette looked at Tina taking in her beauty and letting the feelings of the past few days wash over her. How could lightening strike her heart twice in one lifetime?
She had loved like this before and the loss had almost killed her. Her mind was telling her to walk away and return to her safe yet loveless life. A life where people she loved didn’t pay the ultimate price for her failures.
But her heart, her heart told her to stay and find a place with the woman in front of her.
Bette looked in Tina’s eyes and saw sadness, defeat and acceptance. It was at this moment Bette knew that she would spend the rest of her life chasing the sadness from Tina Kennard’s eyes.
For the first time in a long time Bette Porter decided to follow the feelings in her heart rather than the thoughts in her mind.
Tina broke away, finding it too painful to look at Bette knowing she was going to be without her. She slowly looked up when she felt the warm touch of Bette’s hand on hers.
She raised her head and with a slight gasp met Bette’s gentle, loving gaze. Tina shook her head as if to say she didn’t understand until Bette finally spoke the words her heart had just whispered.
“I don’t ever want to finish this,” she said quietly knowing that her words and meaning needed to be for Tina only.
Tina looked at Bette’s face surprised to see the love and support reflected once more. The pain, fear, and uncertainty she had seen just moments ago was replaced by a subtle sense of calm.
Tina was confused by the rollercoaster shift in Bette’s emotions, but didn’t really care because the suffocating sense of loneliness and isolation she had felt just moments ago was gone as quickly as it had come. The two women said nothing, letting soft smiles speak for them both.
Tina squeezed Bette’s hand and with relief flooding every nerve in her body, closed her eyes and waited for Bette to begin again.
Under the detective’s gentle hand, the two women spent the next emotion-filled hour walking through the crime scene trying to draw any further details from Tina’s faded memory.
As she gently guided Tina through the blood-soaked rooms of her apartment, Bette painfully accepted that the man she hunted now had the power to change her life forever.
Even though she despised even the thought of him, she was inexplicably linked to a man who wanted the exact opposite of everything in Bette’s heart.
He wanted Tina living in fear and Bette wanted to keep her safe. He wanted Tina to feel pain and Bette wanted her to feel love. He wanted to bring Tina to her end, and Bette wanted nothing more than a new beginning, for both of them.
Bette now accepted that they were two opposing forces on a collision course wanting, no needing, different things but destined to meet just the same
TBC
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Great chapter! You are an amazing writer!
wow… i just can’t get enough… and i know the alpa bette ..the cop bette will show through soon… i know i posted my comment on your last ch late.. i read at work and can’t comment there.. but i hope you read it…looking forward to the next ch…
hey leave an e mail address… or e mail me… i would love to talk to you… AmandaMG54@msn.com
I hope Bette has her security system installed because they will need it if she is going to be away from home a lot. Anyway, another fabulous update. I gasp everytime I see a new chapter come through and then I find the nearest qiuet place and commence to reading. You never disappoint.
sox – you are doing such a fantastic job with this story, I appreciate your effort and am glad you are having fun with it. I look for your posts daily and you never disappoint with your incredible characterization of these two women.
One request which I’m not sure is fair to ask of an author but please please please don’t have a rape in your story. I know there may need to be an encounter and possibly a rescue type situation but no sexual violence if you can see what I’m saying. Thanks.
DAMN GOOD………YOUR GREAT…….PLEASE POST SOON….
I think your idea about Bette being “linked to a man who wanted the exact opposite of everything” in her heart is a really interesting and powerful idea. How many times detectives and criminals can be the two sides of a same coin (“two opposing forces” here), in a way ? That’s a truly fascinating theme. Bravo.
Ah, so much inward warmth in this cold room !
How beautiful, this moment of shared silence… So full of meaning…
True and deep feelings never need words to be expressed, when there’s two souls reunited to understand them.
God, some particular things in Tina and Bette’s intimate thoughts here just awaked few old scars in me…
Well, that’s also writers’ special talent to bring their readers far beyond the first level of a story to make them realize some things about themselves. That’s something my own alltime favorite psychological detective stories’ author learned to me and, well, that can be pretty devastating sometimes…
Well, as you can see I’m not only a passionate cinema lover, but also a perpetual self-searcher through all my favorite stories, everywhere.
Thank you for that – even if it’s painful. It helps me in a way…
Sorry for this out-of-the-line comment, but I needed to express it.
Put the blame to your more than ever excellent, deeply engaging and so sensitive story !
Few words more : your passion for writing is so obvious in the notes you so kindly add to this chapter, I love that. I love warm and passionate people like you. Keep the flame !!
… and, please, never feel “humbled” : you can really be proud of your so-called “little tale”. ^_^
simply amazing!
this is great!!!!!!!
soxy – you said in a comment u would tell yourself u could only read 1 chappy at nite of a p.c. novel. u couldnt do it, i cant either, btw, but thats what ur doing yo us. no fair ;-) i cant say enuf about how u take me inside the characters. i can actually feel theoir pain sorrow, anger, psychosis, determination, tepradation (sp) and love. its overwhelming. your descriptions, dialogues and neuances (s0), excellent. good lick and have fun subday at the fund raiser. im exceedlingly depressed about my hand. cant do a damn thing with it. your such a ff slut. mainlining in a corner. i duck under the table at work. he he
Heart tugging, lyrical and simply amazing!
OMG..I never want this story to end
That was good!
Very nice how Bette came to these realizations. Tina really needs to find her self worth. Thanks so much for your telling
Very intense chapter filled with emotion. Keep up the good work! I can’t get enough of this story. Your talent is truly amazing.
“..suffocating sense of loneliness…” That line produced such a visceral reaction from me I was astonished. That’s the mark of a gifted writer.
The sheer depth of Tina’s despair when she thought she was unloveable was heartbreaking. To feel that unworthy of being loved is a pain that no one should have to endure. Thank goodness Bette was able to assuage her fears.
You did a splendid job in showcasing Bette’s terror when she realized that she was ultimately going to be Tina’s savior…that she HAD to be Tina’s savior. Eventually, I imagine she will also realize that protecting Tina will end up being her own salvation as well.
You navigate so gracefully in and out of intense emotional shifts and foreboding story arcs that we are able to ride safely in the wake, feeling secure that you will protect us from the dangerous shifts in the current just below the surface.
Curious to know if you have a background in criminal justice?
Hee hee hee…tell you hubby my offer still stands (with said provisions). Yes, I am that greedy for more of your chapters.
Deep realization for Bette – well written.