Shane’s POV:

Confusion.. its the state of which my mind is working… especially with the massive pounding in my head.. i always over do it.. the bright sunlight isn’t helping and i have to close my eyes as we take a seat on the back steps.. i still have no fucking clue what happened this morning.. i woke up to Shay starring down at me and now I’m sitting here in nervous silence next to a man i don’t know.. not really anyways.. a man i call my father.. god my fucking head hurts..

I glance over at him.. he looks different from the last few times Ive seen him and by the way he starring at his hands, i can tell he’s waiting for me to talk first.. to break the silence.. but i can’t find anything to say.. part of me hates him with everything i have in me.. its the part that blames him for everything that’s ever gone wrong in my life… but the other part can’t hate him.. to be honest i understand him more then i would like to admit.. i realize I’m staring at him and quickly shift my gaze to the ground.. which right now seems very interesting.. this is torture.. then i hear it..

The sound of Carmen and Shay laughing.. and i cant fight the smile that forms on my face.. god will the feeling they give me ever go away?.. i hope not..

"whats with the goofy grin" his calm voice rings in my ears and i look over at him.. hes wearing a similar smile.. and I’m even more confused by the way hes acting..

"nothin.. "i said.. then laugh when he raises his eyebrow, questioning me.. "its just…. them" i gave in and turned around motioning to Carmen, who has Shay in her lap at the table.. hes squirming around in her arms as she tickles him senseless..

"Shane.."

"ya.. " i say still watching the two in the kitchen, through the screen door.. not hearing the seriousness in his tone..

"I’m proud of you"

My head snaps back to look at him.. speechless.. i wonder if I’m fucking hearing things, but i know I’m not.. and i can’t fight the tears welling in my eyes.. he continues… looking me in the eyes making sure i can see he’s being honest.. and suddenly my head doesn’t hurt anymore..