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Canyons of the Past – Tina
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I look at her intently because the bomb has yet to drop. “Okay, I feel better.” I lie.
“When the water in the birthing tub turned red around us, I remember screaming, and I have this vision of myself, Bette, writhing – so naked in front of you. I felt myself dying at one point, while in your arms.”
“Baby, it was so horrible.”
“I’ve been stuck there for a while – in that near-death skipping moment – and I relive that incredible pain before the baby coming.”
“Baby, I was with you. I was there the whole time.” She’s so beautiful to me, always so lovely, and my heart tightens hearing her story.
Tina turns away from me. ”I’ve been having a hard time coming back from that, and feeling open to being with you again.”
”Why . . . but how could that separate us?”
“It makes no sense saying it out loud. It’s something . . .”
“Vulnerable? Safe with me? Imagine how it was for me watching you slip away!”
“I don’t know anymore. Let me close my eyes . . .for five more minutes.”
___________
People say running clears your mind. Good for them. Running causes me pain – and when I can’t deal – I push my body harder and harder, to feel more than I can stand. It’s a temporary alleviation, but apparently everything else is, too.
As I drive up to the canyon to run, I’ve had time to consider how fantastic our love making was, and how – an hour later – she’d turned cool and unapproachable again. I’ve hit my limits for coping with out pain or liquor. I begin to stretch out my legs, and then. . .
I run.
Back before she was furious at me – and my idiotic diversion with Candace – Tina’s steady emotions were always the ones I could count on to come home to. I was the one who had the most demanding irritations, and the most unbelievably important things to vent.
Now, I’m at the other pole of extremes. Tina’s needs and feelings, and the baby’s care – both of them far outweigh my own. They need and I respond. Over and over I’ve done this, since she’s been home. I’ve been on ’it’. I’ve done the best I can – one hundred percent of the time – so, for once, I don’t think this is a fuck up of mine. This is, however; something I have no idea how to fix.
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Thanks, enjoyed it
The end of the story made me laugh hard! Your sense of humor is fantastic!
Enjoyed it the first time and again.
Thank you!
After their long awaited afternoon alone together – in the previous story titled, “Remembering Me” – we meet them at the beginning of “Canyons”, a beautiful story told back and forth in each of the lover’s points of view. However, in “Remembering Me” – the tale that precedes “Canyons” there’s a very amusing prepping for seduction scene with Bette, where part of the way through it, she imagines herself as a high diver, and a sport’s announcers voice comes into her head. From there forward the love scene’s beginnings is fraught with her overarching anxiety, and is hilarious. It is here: http://bit.ly/LesFanRememberingMe ——- Following “Canyons” is an equally sexy tale, “Lightning Bugs”. It’s narrative is sequential, and I know you’ll enjoy it, too. — It picks up with them still in the car together at the trailhead, a lovely sexy moment, and at the end of “Lightning Bugs” the couple returns home, after a bizarre dinner with a pill-popping Alice, and Bette presses Tina with questions about her up and down mood swings. Tina tells Bette a strange tale from her past while they make love. The tale, as you can guess, includes Lightning Bugs.
A Reader called my attention to a story in this WeHo series that finds Bette at the silent retreat, “Not Another Word” is its title. I read it again late yesterday after I got her email. After the humor and sensuality of the last three stories described above, on Bette’s silent retreat, I was struck by how I had painted the pictures of the stillness Bette was there to seek with the Buddhists, but was instead so haunted with disturbing thoughts of her past missteps, gaffs, mistakes, and regrets. I wrote it in an amusing way only slightly, my purpose was to paint her mind chaffing at the quiet, and in so far as its portrayal goes, I was pleased with the deep emotions of hers that came through. It’s challenging to take a meditation’s focus on a droplet of water and expand that into a universe of thoughts when the mind is supposed to be quieting itself into one. Bette, naturally, fails the challenge. The stories that come after that one very blue-toned chapter, “Not Another Word” such as, “The Ant Farm” where Tina remembers a trip they took to Wales and making love near an old Druid ruins are entertaining to read. There’s the scene I created post-Dana’s funeral, where the group of friends steal her ashes, in the story, “Tomb Raider” Then, they must figure out what to do with them, now sealed in a Starbucks cup! It’s impossible for me not to make up something unusual, and at times, completely outrageous for their “behind the scenes” action. Please enjoy. Thanks to everyone for their PMs, tweets, and emails, as we take a step back to the past in the stories of mine in “WeHo: Behind the Scenes”. All for now, Blackbird
At the end of the story, and in the clickable comments under it, are links to the very amusing and sexy romp of a tale that preceded this one, “Remembering Me”, and immediately come after “Canyons”, in it’s original timelines, the link to the beautiful story, “Lightning Bugs”. All three in sequence, are wonderful insights into the period just after Angelica came home, and our favorite couple were rekindling their love for each other.
When BETTE gets sex on the brains no dance floor,no barn door,not even TINA can get her to back down.BETTE is the master of blocking TINA’s protests that she should ‘ve been a ball player.When the need for TINA outweighs the risks BETTE plays to win even if she has to use her tongue to do it.thanks