“I’m sorry Porter – I kinda have to go right now. I’m really sorry, we’ll get back on this later,” she tells me, standing up. I stand up as well and stretch, the weekend has exhausted me. We have a whole lot of assignments to make and tests to study for and fact is that I do study more than the rest of my class together.

“It’s okay, Shane. Have…” I hesitate a bit about my choice of words. “Have fun with Carmen.”

My tall friend casts me a surprised look. “How do you know it’s her?”

“I could tell by your face. Really, Shane, never in this lifetime had I thought you would find someone you want to stay together with and not dish after some nights.”

Shane blushes, that doesn’t happen a lot. “Yeah, she’s kinda special to me. See you tomorrow?”

“If you’re showing up, yes.”

“That depends entirely on Carmen,” Shane replied, grinning like a cheshire cat. As this house has become a second home to her over the past few years, she knows the way out. I go to my desk and start my computer, cleaning up the mess I’ve made to kill time until I see my wallpaper appearing. I sigh when I look at it. My background says so much about what my life is like. Hiding, secrecy, pretending. I stare at it and James Franco looks back at me, casting me a sexy look that probably makes millions of girls whimper in their seats. I don’t get moved by it, his body or eyes or anything about him don’t arouse me. I’m sure that if I would have the nerve to put Nicole Kidman there, I would be. James Franco doesn’t activate my inner fangirl – okay, nor does Nicole Kidman. I’m just not the fangirl type. As I am thinking this, I chuckle to myself at the irony. Me, not a fangirl? Then why am I running my ass off to make sure I get at least one glimpse of her every day? Why do I feel like I will die a most slow and painful death if there is a day she doesn’t seem to be at school for whatever reason? Why do I dread Wednesdays? Why are school holidays pure hell to me? I am such a fangirl.
The reason James Franco is on my background and not Nicole Kidman is my father. It’s not like he cares enough to be invading my privacy, but there’s always a chance. Ridiculous, really, as I am more at home than he is. If he’s back before 8.30. PM it’s a miracle. But somehow I always get scared that some day he will check and he will know that I am gay. Yes, if he would see a woman on my background, he would assume that I was gay, he would confront me and I am the worst liar in history.