“I hope she doesn’t remember anything about that.  She would shit herself” Ben remarks and he is right she would

“Well….It gets better…or worse…I mean fuck I don’t know…But I tell her to sit and she plops down pulling me with her and I end up on top of her with her on her back on the bed”

Ben raises his eyebrows “Oooook”

“Yeah.  And let me tell you Bette is severely horny when she is drunk and proceeded to pull me into her and lays a lingering kiss on my neck that sent my body on fire…..My neck Ben…And I felt rushes going to places I never felt before.  I was so turned on” I say almost embarrassed but I sigh and continue “……somehow she got her hand on my ass and squeezed it.  It took all I had to pull away from her.  Thankfully she passed out but not before she whispered Choose Me”

I sigh as I look at Ben

“Damn!….So you are into women is what your saying or are you just into Bette?”

I sigh and shake my head “I don’t know..I’m so confused”

“Let me get out coffee and we can try to see where you are at”

“Thanks” I say it feels really good to be able to talk to someone about this.

Ben returns handing me a cup and I take sip relishing the taste as it hit my mouth “Mmmm…You make the best coffee”

“I do don’t I” he says and smiles “So she said choose me huh?”

I nod

“Ok…Let’s see where is your head at right now with Bette and Nathan…And your heart for that matter” he says like a professional therapist

Sometimes maybe I wish he wasn’t so blunt at times…Geez

“Ben….My head is all over the place.  I’m extremely confused about my sexuality.  I realize that Bette turned me on last night and I guess if I can be honest I do check women out but I never did it in a lustful way or anything..Maybe I was just playing it off as I was comparing myself to them but I never let myself think if I wanted to fuck them are not”

Ben nods at me

“I can understand that.  I did the same when I was struggling with my sexuality…But when I kissed a girl for the first time I didn’t feel anything and when I was near a boy I found cute or liked my heart would race, my palms would sweat and I was nervous around them”