“Well it’s cold out, hurry up” she smiled sweetly at me, god I missed that smile. Her smile always seemed to brighten up my day, even after the shittiest days.

I followed her into the house, crossing the threshold. Looking around I grinned, it was exactly the same as the last time I was here, nothing had changed—especially not my Tina.

“I was just making a cup of tea, would you like one?”

“Yes thank you”

I followed her into the kitchen and just stood there watching her. I would sometimes have to catch myself before anyone would noticed but it was nice not have to censer myself. It was the first time we had been alone in such long time.

“So” she asked, pulling me out of my comatose state, handing me a hot mug “How’s the gallery?”

“Oh” why is she talking about the gallery? Shouldn’t we be discussing more important things? But if that’s what she wanted to do, avoid the obvious, and then let her be. I sat down at the table, I don’t think my legs could take this much longer “It’s good. I am playing with the idea of opening up in New York but…”

Taking the seat across from me “Well as I recall you always loved New York”

“Yeah” I smile at her weakly, both of us remembering the same weekend we had spent together “That was a fantastic weekend”

She nodded at me “I shouldn’t have said that… with everything that happened after. I’m sorry”

“Do you regret it?” I ask suddenly “Being with me?”

Her hazel eyes soften “No, Bette. I regret everything but that” she absentmindedly reached over and took my hand in hers. I closed my eyes, enjoying the feel of her skin on mine “You really shouldn’t be here right now” It had been so long. I missed it so much.

My eyes quickly open and meet hers “But here I am”

“You have no idea how hard this is for me to stay away from you and if it was a different time and I had met you first, maybe things we might have had a chance but they aren’t. I still fall for my best friend’s partner”

“Am I doing the right thing, Tina?” I didn’t know why I was asking her this. If I was already in doubt then why not just end it like I should have done in the beginning and not be so chicken shit.