I don’t know what it is, but now she’s so completely open. She’s not brooding, she doesn’t cry anymore, it seems like her demons are leaving her alone, finally. I dare to say that she seems… happy, even.

We wanted Dante and Cassandra to be here because what we need to ask them is important. It’s the last piece of jigsaw missing in the strange, furiously intense phase of our marriage.

And Shane is thrilled, I can feel it. She throws glances at me, hopeful, happy glances, and smiles. And when she smiles at me that way… all the world just disappears. There are just Shane and me, there is just that white smile and those green eyes and nothing else. No sounds, no colors, nothing but that fragment of perfection and my heartbeat becomes deafening.

“…Tasha is recovering pretty quickly but I’m not surprised. She’s some kind of Terminator”, Dante is saying, lovingly placing his hand on Cassandra’s belly.

She covers his hand with hers.

“She’s not moving, now, Dante…”.

“Just checking”.

“Jesus… You are quibbling”, she giggles.

I smile melancholically and take a sip of my coffee.

“Shane and I would like to ask you something very important…”, I murmur, placing the mug back on the table.

They watch me, puzzled, still smiling. That “future parent look” into their eyes is so amazing and so hard to erase and I take Shane’s hand.

I clear my voice.

“…Dante, Cass… We know that there are many clinics that can do this for us, but… We would be ecstatic if you, Dan, will accept to be the donor…”.

He narrows his eyes, trying to understand.

“…You know, the sperm donor for our son…”, I add, staring at him.

He raises his eyebrows in surprise and relaxes his back against the chair, exhaling a long breath.

Cassandra just smiles a little and looks at him.

“…Is this a problem for you, Cass?”, Shane asks her, with a serious look on her face, “…I mean, we understand if you don’t want your husband to do this thing for us… Technically, biologically, it would be his son, so…”.

”It’s the weight of the world, I know.
As I struggle to be…whole.
It’s the weight of the world, I know.
As you were mine, and we will find…”