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    Story written on March 8, 2010 by str8yesterday.
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    45 votes, average: 4.09 out of 545 votes, average: 4.09 out of 545 votes, average: 4.09 out of 545 votes, average: 4.09 out of 545 votes, average: 4.09 out of 5 (45 votes, average: 4.09 out of 5)
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    Number of Comments: 23
    Words: 1186
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=75127
    Author Notes:

    Tonight is the night. Tonight, I either get everything I have ever and could ever want, or I walk away with a hole in my chest, because I will leave my heart with her, beating with every breath she breathes, for it will never belong to another

    I turn on to her road and see cars lined up on either side. Of course there would be a lot of people here. Tina has a huge family, and they are always around, every last one of them. Not that I am complaining, they have become my family as well, and have treated me better than my own blood. She is the second to the youngest of five siblings. Her parents are the most wonderful two people I have ever had the privilege of knowing, besides their daughter of course. They are kind, and generous and most definitely southern Baptist groupies. The whole lot of ‘em are. That is what scares me so much about my confession and its grand entrance tonight.  I feel that it will not be welcomed. I have been having flashes of burning at the stack or being tarred and feathered. The only thing that gives me a glimpse of hope is Tina’s sister Autumn. Her best friend is Dexter, and he is the portrait of gay. I know that this is far from the answer to my prayers, but it is something. Okay, it’s a stretch, a desperate cry for help. Tina and her family have accepted Dexter and have shown him nothing but kindness. I would expect nothing less from them, but Dexter doesn’t want to rip Tina’s clothes off and violate her in 100 ways or more; give or take a few. I haven’t actually calculated the number of violations that run through my head every single minute of every single day. Her family’s acceptance means so much to me, but Tina’s love means even more. I have almost talked myself into thinking I will be alright, as long as she accepts me for who I truly am. And even more, forgives me for keeping this huge part of me from her. She deserves nothing less than a whole person, and I will be giving her that for the first time tonight, all of me, every last piece. Whether or not I leave with all my pieces is in her hands……… those able and gentle hands.

    As I am walking up the driveway, I can feel my heart creeping into my throat. It is a big fat chicken just like me. Trying to escape and run as far as it can in the other direction. I swallow, putting it back in its place, for now. I reach out to knock on the door, but before my fist can reach my one last barrier, it suddenly swings open. “Bette” I hear her say. I am too afraid to look up. I know that when I do, I will be staring into her angry eyes. She has every right to be mad at me. “Look at me!” she says. I stare at her feet for a few seconds at her black stiletto heels. I slowly trail up her legs to her mid thigh where her dress starts coming into my view. It is a deep purple and looks like it might almost feel as soft as her skin. I then make my way up to her chest where I see that the dress is lacking in this area, like this part of the dress didn’t show up for the party. It is low cut, but in a classy way, because Tina could never be anything else. I then see her long neck. My eyes hesitate on her scar at the base of her glorious neck. She used to try and cover it, but as learned to embrace it. I love looking it at because it is a reminder that she is alive and that I had almost lost her, but that is another story for another day. I am just stalling, trying to delay my arrival at her eyes, the souls of everything that is Tina. As I make my way past her lips, then her perfect nose, I finally look up to find that I was wrong. I was not looking into her angry eyes. Her eyes were blue, her eyes were sad. I could tell that at some point today she had been crying. My arms automatically wrapped around her, and all I could think was, please, oh please, let me be enough for her.

     

    TBC =)

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    Comments

    3. omg…you are awesome. you are captivating me with this story. the way you take time to pen the littlest details is truly appreciated. I eagerly await the next chap.

    4. wow… now i have to wonder why tina looked like she was crying… i just hope tina didn’t meet someone in the 6 weeks bette has been hiding out… and thats why she was crying… i hope i’m wrong… lets hope tina feels the same way to bette as bette is to her… love this… pps

    8. This is a wonderfully written story but the title changes keep me mixed up. Could the title changes become the chapter subject instead and stick to one story title, less confusing that way. I keep thinking I have not read any of the story until I go backwards and read and see that it is the same story. Hope bette will be the only one there for the first hour or so, maybe they can talk a little. REally, really like this story. Can hardly wait for them to talk and also to hear what Tina is thinking. Loved the part about Uncle Odell, that was hilarious. Just loved it. Thanks for sharing with us. PPS.

    12. This is such a beautifully written story. Bette’s anguish is palpable and painful to read. I can’t wait to see where this story will lead.

    17. Str8, you rocked it out of the park once again. Any chance of posting faster? LOL!!! I know, patience. Okay, so this part (and a bit that followed) had me on the floor, because I’m often given a similar lecture: “Bette, I swear on my uncle Odell’s grave, I don’t understand why you have a cell phone! If you are not going to answer it then it is useless, much like that blue tooth headset, because I have told you time and time again, people just think you are talking to yourself!” LMAO!!! Too funny. Thanks for coming through and posting your first fan fic. ;-)

    20. I didn’t bother to read all the comments through, I wanted to write down this so fast: has ever someone told you that you are talented?I meant this very seriously!…=)

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