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    Feelings… Chapter 10

    “But even when you had the chance to tell me, Tina, you didn’t!  How did I find out that you had an issue about Marcus?  Because you talked to Alice about it, and she called me to tell me I needed to talk to you.  Who was there when you took the pregnancy test that turned up positive?  Alice, again!  And you knew she couldn’t keep it to herself!  How do you think it made me feel to find out that all of our friends knew about it before me? 

    “Then, you could have told me that you had gone back to the cryobank, but I found out you were pregnant from, of all people, Helena!  And again, everyone knew about it before I did!  So it goes both ways, Tina—you had plenty of opportunities to talk to me.  I mean, you didn’t even call me from Dr. Wilson’s office when you miscarried!”

    “Think about it, Bette—so many times when I tried to talk to you, you were preoccupied with some drama at the CAC!  You had a conference call, or you had to meet with an artist, or you had to smooth over things with Franklin.  You kept cutting me off when I would try to talk to you!  So why would I think you would interrupt whatever you were doing when almost every time I tried to break into your routine, you’d snap at me or start whining about the Philistines!  I didn’t know how to get through to you, and I didn’t want to have to go through that every time there was something we needed to talk about.  So I just stopped trying.  On top of that, I was feeling so insecure about what was going on between us since we were having so many problems connecting.  In hindsight, I know I was wrong about the way I handled some things, Bette, but I think you need to come clean, too, and ‘fess up about your part in all of this!”

    Bette hated these kinds of conversations.  It reminded her so much of how Melvin made her feel so inadequate, since he set such high standards for her.  No matter what she did, he wanted her to do more, or be better.  The pressure took its toll on her over the years, and it frustrated her to no end that she felt like a small child around him in spite of the fact that she was a grown and professionally successful woman. 

    Comments

    1. Is it jealousie, hurt or just want to torcher Bette more? She played a big part in their downfall. Yet Bette went out side to get relief. So Tina will blame her forever. thanks

    2. yes what a place to stop… and i agree tina doesn’t really need all of the details… but hey at least they are talking… its better they they did on the show… if they at least talked on the show… all of us TIBETTERS’ WOULD BE VERY HAPPY

    3. First, I agree with pandamel; TOO MUCH INFORMATION…why does Tina need hear all the dirty details and is she going to reciprocate with the nasties about Helena and Henry…and will they have HOT make up sex? Second, a friend and I did a marathon last weekend of watching season 1: Ishe is a white woman and I am biracial…I found it VERY interesting that she didn’t notice but I did that in the jail scenario, they separated the WHITE WOMEN from the BIRACIAL/AFRO-AMERICAN WOMEN and gave the reason that THEY (the afro-ammer/biracial women) were TOO DANGEROUS!!!!!! I congratulate L WORD forhighlighting ‘racism; however subtly: Third: my impression of the affair was Bette did not have to be in CINTROL like with in her life with Tina…it is easy to say BETTE wasn’t giving T enuff attention but central to BETTE’S LIFE at that time was the struggle to HOLD ONTO HER LIVLIHOOD FOR THEM…add to that the miscarriage/father troubles/lack of communication/when Bette reached out Tina took off or shut up/Tina being able to share all the good things with their friends/Bette’s focus on that shit Franklin!!!! I don’t blame either of them for the mess that eventuated…when pressure comes on, compounded by the trauma of illness and death…something has to give and in this case like so many other relationships they BROKE…now can they forgive and find each other again…whew, that was a rave, sorry!!! lmao

    4. Two chapters in so little time, indeed ! Brava Arr ! Way to go ! You know, somehow I understand why Tina wants to know exactly what happened ( however morbid and masochistic it may appear ) and I’m sure it’s going to help Bette as well. In fact, I’m pretty sure that unconsciously Bette needed to come clean to Tina about what had really happened and she needed that for a long time in my opinion. Really, in the long run, I’m sure it’s going to make their relationship – or whatever it is they’re sharing right now – a lot “healthier”. At any rate, however excruciating this conversation may seem right now, I’m sure it’s going to be a great relief for them both to finally be able to talk about that ” taboo ” affair. But then again, it cannot get much worse at this point, can it ?… Oh, well of course it can, actually it did in the world according to Miss Chaiken. Anyway, Arr, as I was expecting, you’re doing a great job at “fixing” those two’s issues. I can see they’re already making huge progress. Yes, they’re finally communicating, which is a giant step for them. Please keep posting. I’m loving this story. Exactly the kind of drama I like.

    5. Just a reminder that this story takes place prior to Josh and Henry–all we know about is Tina’s cybersex, and it makes sense that if Bette comes clean, then Tina will, too, with all the morbid details. But if she weren’t nudged to do so, would she? Mwahahahahaha!!!! ;-)

    6. hey no fair ending the chapter there! great talk. I agree that Tina does not need every detail, but she would probably go crazy thinking about any holes in the story, so if she must I say Bette really does not have anything to loose by telling all right now. pps.

    7. Wow…Bette is giving the blow by blow…I thought she would breeze thru some parts. “Did you cum Bette” wow is she trying to establish the extent of their connection to try to say Bette had stronger feelings for Candace? They have so much to talk about…all that time not communicating. Please post soon so we can see if Bette came…I think we all did when we saw that scene on the show but I just want to make sure she did…lol

    8. I agree with Skycaptain. I think Tina is trying to establish the nature of Bette and Candace’s relationship. Was it purely a sex thing or much more? And I think by Bette talking about it, she herself will truely understand also. Thanks for the update Sweetie. PPS

    9. I hope these painful, hesitating, vulnerable steps bring them closer.Thanks for your creative and meticulous approach and I hope you post again soon.

    10. OMG! Your writing is just amazing babe! I’ve finally managed to catch up. Read it all tonight- yep- a gazillion years after I said I would! :-) Post soon! Lookng forward to the next one!

    11. Well Arr, you certainly know where to stop a story? And ah…yes Tina Bette came….oh boy…this was an intense conversation..but seriously…does Tina REALLY want to hear THAT kind of details? egads! ok ok get back to posting!!

    12. Maybe it’s my slaphappy mood because I got all of 2 hours of sleep, but that last sentence amuses me. It’s like, “Bette, if you didn’t cum, then it doesn’t count.” And I know that’s not the direction you’re taking us. Sadly my brain is fried so I can’t really comment on the talking. It just needed to be done, but way sooner than this.

    13. Thanks so much Arr, this story is so vivid and holds so much more in it than the one of IC. This is a perfect example of what a writer or a performer can accomplish….the play is never as good as the book. Normally the book comes first, in this case your addition to the play is beyond words. It shows us that once you stop talking to each other, it becomes more and more difficult to start with it again. All those little things unsaid grow and grow untill it’s one big mess which explodes in our own faces. I love your work and I’m honoured that you allow me to read it.

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