Fan Fiction
This story has been set to a rating of PG-13. Age verification is required to proceed.
Feelings… Chapter 11
Login to add story to favorites
(49 votes, average: 3.69 out of 5)You need to be a registered member to rate this post.
Loading ...
Tina was working hard to push all of her buttons. It was becoming increasingly difficult for her to not lash out, but since it was her actions less than two years ago that brought them to this point, she held her tongue.
Then Tina said, ”I see it all over your face—something I said was right on target! Which one, Bette? It’s always all about you, isn’t it? Sometimes, you are so selfish—do you even think about how what you do affects others? Did you really think I wouldn’t find out? That I wouldn’t be upset? That I would just forgive you? Get real, Bette!
“And now, you have the nerve to be picky about taking a job! Money is far too tight to wait for something that will make you happy. I will not let you jeopardize our household again! At least back then, it was just you and me, but now, we have Angelica. I think it’s too soon for me to go back to work, but I’ll tell you this, Bette—if an opportunity comes along, I might just decide to take it. At least I’m going to look out for Angelica’s best interests!”
Bette spat back, “Oh! So this is what this ‘feelings for men’ is really about? You want someone to take care of you—to make you feel secure! You want a nice, uncomplicated life that doesn’t cause you to stretch too much! I knew you were going to eventually say it—it’s too hard being with me and having a biracial child—‘too much otherness’—yeah…
“But Tina, haven’t I shown my ability to provide for you over the years? Haven’t I done everything in my power to rebuild our nest egg since my father died? Don’t you understand that I also want to spend time with our baby, so I’ve tried to cut back on work—it’s not a lack of desire to work! All you do is snipe at me about money and make sarcastic remarks—I can’t seem to do anything right anymore.
“Our whole lives have changed since Angelica was born, and we’re struggling to find a balance between sleep, feedings, working, social lives and everything else. Is it too hard for you, Tina? Is that what this is about? Why now, Tina? I mean, I have done everything I know how to be supportive to you, to show you how sorry I am about what happened, and when you said you wanted to raise our child in our home, I thought you were ready to talk about things.
“I know you’re self-conscious about your scar after the C-section, so I’ve waited to take your lead about lovemaking again. But now, you’re talking about ‘feelings for men’—what the heck is that about? After all we’ve been through, you don’t want me anymore? You want some man to put his hands on you? Who, Tina? Do you have the hots for someone in particular? You have to tell me something!”
“Your choices and actions tore us apart, and you think I owe you something? I don’t owe you a damned thing, Bette! This is all your fault! I’m tired of it…I need a break!”
“What do you mean, you need a break?”
“Just leave, Bette! Get out of the house! I don’t care where the fuck you go, just go! I…I just can’t deal with this right now!”
“But you can’t…”
“Stop! Just stop talking. I can’t say anymore, I can’t hear anymore—JUST GO!!!!!!
TBC
Comments
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
Great update baby……..PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not have us waiting so long. BTW isnt that Bette’s house Tina asking her to leave from?
Oh, Arr! you’ve done it again girl! ya know I love it when Candace is in fan fic, bad as it might be. Don’t make me wait too long.*wink*
Wow ! That was intense indeed ! And I must say I would have never predicted it would have ended this way, with Tina asking Bette to leave. That was a great twist, anyway. I love the direction you’re taking this story, Arr. I love this dialogue and your insight into these character’s psyches, especially since Tina’s mind is still a great mystery as far as the show is concerned. Well, not that we can all read Bette like an open book of course, she’s a very complex character, but compared to Tina… Yeah, well, you know what I mean… Now, I need to admit that I would love for Bette to find the courage to tell Tina what really happened with Candace, not the “technical” details, but what she had in mind when she was with her and why she kept seeing her for a whole month after Tina found out and what appealed to her in Candace ( because she still hasn’t answered that one if my memory serves me right ). Was it her confidence ? Was it because she seemed so different from Tina ? Was it just because she was the first person that had showed some interest in her at a time when Bette was very vulnerable and insecure ? Did her biraciality have anything to do with that ? I still think that the affair was a self-destructive “move” from Bette. She couldn’t find any answers or any solution anymore. There seemed to be no way out and she was so desperate, so stressed out,… Everything had become so complicated that, at some point, she probably felt that by getting out of that relationship – a relationship that was becoming so heavy to bear alone – ( ’cause I think she believed she was carrying their relationship alone after Tina lost the baby ), she would get away from all her problems and anxiety… And what better and easier way for such a serial monogamist to sabotage her committed relationship than having an affair with the first person who was there, the first person she came across and showed some interest in her ( thus imo the fact that Candace was a carpenter ) ?Anyway, just a personal theory. So sorry for the rambling, I guess I got a little carried away… LOL !Actually, the point I was trying to make was just that I love the fact that you chose to get to the bottom of things and although your chapter was not very long, I loved it and I really hope you’re going to keep them ( really ) talking this way. They need to go there… Where it hurts. And the sooner the better. ‘Cause in the end it will be healthy for the both of them. If Tina wants to know more about the affair, I think Bette should tell her in all honesty and same goes the other way around. Tina needs to ask herself where those feelings for men are coming from all of a sudden. All right, I’m getting a little too carried away once again, but I definitely hope we’ll soon have the pleasure of reading your take on those things. Keep up the fantastic job, Arr. And thanks for sharing your talent with us.
yes we care if you posted,but not soo long next time please.and the ladies needs to listen to each other even if it hurts to hear it so they can start building up the trust again.p.p.s.
Arr, you know on one hand it is difficult to relive these moments or delve into these conversations particularly when considering where TPTB have the ladies now in their arc. Yes, they dangled a bit of hope this season and the fact is that they do have to have “this conversation”. One thing is clear that they have to be at a place to even be able to have this conversation without it totally being destructive. As I digested this leg of your story, it is evident that in Season 4 they sooo weren’t ready for it…but I think they are getting there and hopefully getting ready. I still don’t get why did B stayed with Candy for so long? I get the feeling that it wasn’t about Candace but about escaping to something that was easier…less burdensome…less demanding…hiding out…getting lost…hmmm….Looking forward to your next post!! PPS
Well That went well. Glad 2 C U back.
I am surprised that Bette did not tell Tina to leave. I am beginning to think that if this had taken place on the show then Tina would never have left. Even though this is intense they are at least talking and screaming.
Damn this is bad and hope they calm down!
Ok, I wanted to just leave ‘Wow…’ but BaTF threw me off with the Xena comment…
=O
yaaay! angst. fantastic. though, i’ve never understood why bette continued to be punished about the candace affair so long after the fact, AND yet still never really took responsibility for it verbally. it seemed to be the nail in tibette’s coffin. anyway, great post!
whoa that was intense! i can see a really long talk afterwards. im excited for the next one :)
Glad to see you posting gain. But damn, I didn’t expect Tina to kick Bette to the curb. PPS
Wow its been a long time since you posted.What an intense chapter. Tina needs to calm herself down and take some responsibility here and why is she asking Bette to leave.PPS I want to see what happens next.
Harsh!
they have to listen to each other…it reminds me of episode in Xena, when Xena and Gabrielle were yelling at each but not listening and it almost ruined them…i hope tina will change her mind
Arr!! SOOOO SORRY for getting to comment sooo late…no exceptions except,,,10 lashes with a wet noodle!! This was great as usually. I love how you’re building the drama up, it’s great! And hopefully you’ll post another one very soon…but i know you’re messing with another fic with a ship that will…alarm the hell out of some people…LOL! keep it posting!!
I’m ashamed, I was always looking out for chapter 11 of this story…after awhile I gave up looking for it on a daily basis and problably missed reading this chapter. I’ve read today a post of you in the new thread here called ‘constructive criticism’ and that’s what made me look for it again. I was pleased to find 2 new chapters written more than a year ago, I didn’t need to re read the story because what’s been said in it was still clearly in my mind. It was indeed my all time favority story, one of those who left me sometimes speechless and sometimes shook my life. I loved reading your insight in the souls of both our girls…I love how you show how deep someone can be wounded by infidelity but also what caused that infedility. There are indeed always 2 sides of the medal. Of course Bette came and of course she came hard, she wanted to numb herself, she tried to give strength to Tina, she was eating her own pain at that time and she was being refused. After they came back together how could she have talked about what happened because Tina refused her again. I understand both parties. Tina’s been self-concious on that scar, well I have a similar experience…I have two large scars on my body, one from between my breasts till my navel and one from my left thigh over my belly to my right thigh. My wife ignores them she acts like those are not there, she avoids looking at them and touching them, when she touches them by accident she excuses herself and then I just want to run away from her. Being in a relationship is to give some and to take some but when you feel that you have to take all the shit and still have to give the best of you…well then it’s time to evaluate things and TALK about them.