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Feelings… Chapter 8
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"I asked myself, why? What was it that drew me to her? I barely knew her, but I couldn’t help myself! Where did this come from? Tina, this is true–I had never come close to considering cheating on you in all our time together. Candace caught me totally off guard, and I apparently was not as strong as I thought I was.
"I thought about this for a long time, and I realized that part of it was just that Candace and I were talking! Can you believe it? We–you and I–never just talked anymore. It was all about the baby–getting ready for the baby. I know this is hard for you to hear, but sometimes, I was tired of talking about the baby! And that little intervention our friends put us through made me feel like such a boring person. I just wasn’t convinced, even after you told me you thought I was the most exciting woman in L.A. to you!
"So when you lost the baby, I felt terribly, terribly guilty! Part of me thought that it was my fault–that I had sent out so much negative energy that somehow, I had killed him…" Bette began to tear up at this recollection, reminded of her remorse that she never felt she could share with Tina.
Again, Tina sat, mutely listening. She had asked Bette to talk to her, and though it was painful, she was compelled to keep silent. Tina realized she had been rude, cutting off Bette so many times during this conversation. It had been a long time since they had talked, and she couldn’t remember a time in recent history when Bette had been so willing to share her feelings. She then reflected on the fact that in her own pain during that time, she had no clue that Bette had felt this way. Tina wanted to reach out to Bette–to say something–but a part of her knew that would stop this outpouring. She drew in a breath and refocused as her own silent tears fell over the loss of their son.
"Tina, I didn’t know what to do. I was so heartbroken for us–for you–I felt I had to be strong for us. You were in so much pain, and I couldn’t bear for you to carry mine, too. So I kept it to myself–but I was dying inside. There was so much pressure at work with the resistance to Provocations. I needed some relief from it all, some radical change. But I wasn’t looking, Tina–you have to believe me!"
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I think they’re going to have to hurt each other with the truth a little bit more before they can get past all of the anger and start working on fixing things. Good job! It takes a lot of guts to try to tackle the mess these two made.
Wow! That was intense! I was so caught up with it. I wish they would have this typr of interaction on the show. I really feel there has been no closure between TiBette. Post soon!
well holy shit ark…..this is amazing….i love the talking it out…it makes wonderful sense of the situation….please, continue soon…..
What a Catfight! I hope clearing the air will help B&T.
Wow, Wow ! I just can’t wait for Tina to hear about what happened next between Bette and Candace… Well, Arkaycee, this is just getting better and better. Yet, you just cannot stop here, this chapter is far too short ( yeah, I know, I’m sooo demanding ! lol ! ). Anyway, your task is obviously very difficult here, you are quite ambitious and I have to say you’re doing an amazing job at getting to the heart of B&T’s issues, at having them talk, really talk for the first time in what seems like ages. Just keep posting Arr, this is brilliant !
this hurt me so much too here but I know most of it is the truth. This is how Bette felt. And the biracial thing did hurt bette deeply. Bette behavior in season one started the beginnning of the end for Bette and Tina. Bette thought she was falling out of love with Tina and so she began to treat her differently. The lack of sex and the thing about Marcus cause Bette to feel rejected. Keep going with the story but I think Bette and Tina need to talk about why they were not having sex as often. That is where the true lies. Bette and Tina forever
Oh boy, B is not pulling any punches….this is like a well choreographed sparring match. Tibette has to come out victorious, but they do need to get through this…get to some level of understanding b4 we can plant our victory flag. I just wonder how detailed B will get with the explaination of their interludes and are the details necessary?
whoaaaaa turbo this is intense!!
Even though it’s tough they need to work through this. It should have happened on the show. Thank you for this crystal clear and detailed interpretation of how and why they unraveled. Exceptional dialogue but Bette doesn’t need to reveal every little bit. Don’t wait so long to post!
what a hard situation for both of them because they are angry and hurt, you ar doing a very good job i hope they can find the way to fix this
Hey ark, I’m just lovn’ it. ‘You tell her T’,I just had to read this before I’m outta here.
Wow, I am so glad that you told us that it will end up a happy Tibette story, because this was very intense.
“Ouch” doesn’t even begin to describe this chapter. PPS!
Intense Rhonda! I love your writing and this story is what should have been shown on the show…talk about drama…this beats all the shallow soap-opera”ness” that they did show on screen. Ilene could learn a few things from you. You’re right – they must say what they are thinking – lay it all out there, let it be known – no more secrets. It’s the only way for them to come out on the other side of it; and I can’t wait to read how you play it out. You’re a brave soul to push through this deamon of a storm and you’re doing an excellent job babe! Can’t wait for more!!!
excellent dialogue. Getting out those harsh feelings.
Great updated PPS.
Well damn. I’m speechless. Bette is going IN!! Reading all that stuff made me mad, I don’t know how Tina’s taking this. I can’t believe Bette ran to Candy after that fight, damn you bette! And i Want Bette to get graphic about her interludes, and i Want Tina to get graphic as well about Helena and Henry. YES. Lay it all out there. This is some good stuff. POSt soon,preferably before the new year.LOL.
Keep in mind that this story took place before Henry, and even Josh, so Tina’s gonna have to share her on-line experiences–or will she? Mwahahahah!
Damn that was intese and they have a lot to talk and work things out. Ok post soon please, thanks!
first line I meant ‘ache and hurt so much’…for that first baby…please continue when you can…it’s not an easy task…I think Bette should spew it all out as should Tina…then let it go…
wow that is such a hard convo to have when they ate and were hurting so much…what got me was how useless their friends and family were at helping them thru the loss of the baby…and how overloaded they both were with really only each other to lean on…sure Bette had Kit but…Bette was not really trusting of Bette which showed in s1 and s1…only in s3 when Bette saw T making out with Henry in their house and she went to Kit…did Kit appear to be trustworthy/funnily enuff when she was in a settled relationship with Angus…you’re doing a great job with a terribly painful situation…the pain of losing the child will take years to ease…it will be a reoccuring hurt for both of them…
Well, the truth really hurts but this is the best conversation anyone has come up with between these two. The way that they both misread each other is so close to reality! Bette waiting for Tina to tell her what to do and Tina waiting for Bette to just KNOW what she needed……so real!Great chapter…..MORE SOON PLEASE!
How great would it be if this happened in S4. A girl can dream that they deal with their issues and get back together. Thank you for this wonderful story.
The hurt has happened…no need to sugar coat it to spare feelings…get all this stuff out in the open so there will be no doubt about what happened and try to move on from there… Tina needs to keep LISTENING and stop interupting. Keep posting….I love this story.