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    First, Last, & Forever? (Version 2.0 – Chapter 20)

    Bette remained silent for a few minutes, enjoying the safety she felt in Tina’s arms. It was unusual for Tina to hold Bette like this.  It was usually the other way around, at least in recent years. Tina used to comfort Bette this way often in the early years of their relationship, but as Bette had taken more and more of the control, she had been less willing to allow Tina to hold her, perceiving it in some way as a sign of weakness. But now, just as Bette knew she couldn’t be in complete control of their relationship, she knew she needed to encourage more moments just like this one. When Bette finally broke her silence, she asked Tina a simple question.

    "Tee, do you remember the day we talked about why I had the affair with Candace?" Bette closed her eyes as she uttered the final words, as if it would somehow negate those fateful events.

    "Yes, Babe, of course I do." Tina’s response was soft, but reassuring. She would probably never forget that day. It was after they had talked about the demise of their relationship, and after Tina had broken up with Helena.

    Tina had been sitting in a chair in her hospital room, feeding Angelica when Bette arrived. Tina recognized the black cloud hanging over Bette’s mood immediately when she stepped into the room, but didn’t mention it. Tina trusted Bette to talk with her when she was ready. Given the dark circles underneath Bette’s eyes, Tina knew Bette had hardly slept. That probably meant she would be ready to talk as soon as they had some time alone. In the meantime, the two proud mothers spent the morning with their perfect little girl until the nurse came in to take Angelica back to the nursery until her next meal that afternoon.

    Tina had remained silent, sitting in the chair where she had been holding Angelica, still trusting that Bette would talk when she was ready. Tina had finally learned that if Bette was close to opening up to her, she needed to back off and give her the space to think it was her idea to communicate. It was only when Bette shut down completely that she needed to push. After several minutes, Bette finally spoke as she positioned herself in front of the window, her back to Tina.

    Comments

    1. Damn, that was a downer. Tina is acting pretty saint like because I’m pretty sure if I was hearing that BS, even if its all true, I’d be way, way more pissed about it.

    2. Steph, this is an intense chapter. Infidelity is hard thing on everyone involved, and the journey back together for the couple, is a task in itself. These chapter evoke quite a bit of emotion for me personally. You are a brilliant writer if you can evoke such raw emotion, and that you do. Thank you for posting.

    3. Some things should be taken to the grave. This Candace thing is one of them. Never, never in a million years would I tell my spouse the blow-by-blow of how I cheated, if I were to cheat. To the grave! And beyond!

    4. Some things you talk about,others you try to keep hidden deep with in yourself. If Bette didnt tell Tina the guilt would eat her alive. It would always be in the back of her mind ready to escape. thanks

    5. Wow, I just caught up with all of this. You are doing such a fantastic job of getting them through all of this. Where were you when season 3 was happening? Your version is so what should have transpired and still should.

    6. Wow…just wow… So intense, so painful for both. But they have to get past this to move forward together so they won’t dwell on assumptions about what happened and why. Another excellent gap filler!

    7. I love your story and this chapter was quite emotional; Bette& Tina are doing a huge step to built a very strong relationship…Please don’t let us wait too long until your next post !! ;-)

    8. whoa!!!! i thught tina would be disgusted by the cell scene…and btw i always thought it was significant that they put the white gals in one cell and the biracial/african-american girls in the other…anyway…pps

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