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First Year- Chapter 18
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I smiled back. We looked at each other then started laughing. “I am an idiot. Thank you for making me laugh.”
“You are welcome. And I am serious. I am here if you need an ear or a sounding board. I really mean that. I appreciate that you were there for me. I hope you consider me a friend.”
I nodded. It was nice to know I had another potential shoulder to cry on. I responded, “You can never have too many friends.”
She shook her head and smiled at me, “No, you can’t.”
She went back out to the general ER and continued to see patients. I collected myself and put a couple of drops of Visine in my eyes. I began keeping a bottle is my lab coat when I returned to work. It helped me not look so upset all the time. The “allergies” excuse was wearing thin. I called up to the ICU to see how Dana was doing and was assured she was stable. I made a mental note to visit her before I left and to call Alice to see how she was coping. I needed to start thinking about something other than myself. Even if I had to force myself, I needed to stay distracted.
I came back on the floor and saw Bette presenting a case to one of the ER attendings, Robin Renoir. We would say behind her back, she was “the new Renoir”. Rumor had it that she had her naked body covered with multiple colors of paint and rolled herself on a canvas, thus “the new Renoir”. Her body was pretty tight. She was an avid runner and had the legs the show it. She, like Bette, was always in designer clothes and heels, but unlike Bette, who favored pant suits, she wore miniskirts. She was married but there were many stories about her with other docs, male and female, and possibly a couple of nurses. I would be lying if I said I denied that I turned my head, like the guys, and watched her as she walked by. As I looked at them discussing the case, the “need to fuck as a crutch”, side of me wondered what it might be like to be sandwiched in between that pair. I knew I was still alive and there was hope for me, when I found myself blushing when they turned to look my way. They must have felt my stare, because they turned simultaneously to look at me. Bette quickly looked away but the “new Renoir” kept her gaze on me until I grabbed another patient’s chart. I smiled at it. Yes, I was indeed still alive and there was still hope for me.
I stopped in to see Dana before I left after my ER shift. It was after midnight. She was awake when I came to the ICU to visit her. After putting on the usual mask, gowns and gloves to protect her from us, I went into her room. She was a shadow of her former self. I lied to her and said what we tell everybody in the hospital. I told her she looked great. She smiled weakly and said to me in a voice just barely above a whisper, “Why does everybody lie? I know I look like shit.”
We laughed, actually she smiled and I laughed. I sat with her and held her hand. She struggled to speak to me and spoke slowly and softly, “Helena, it’s good to see you. I haven’t seen you for such a long time. You look tired. How are things? How was your vacation? Tell me about it.”
That’s all I needed. I started to cry. She looked at me perplexed. I pulled myself together and said, “It’s been a little rough for me. My vacation was incredible but Dylan and I broke up recently.”
With a very raspy voice she asked, “Why?”
“Dana, don’t worry. It’s a long story. Don’t worry about it. You just work on getting better.”
“I’m so tired. I am tired all the time. I hate being in the hospital. When I get home will you come see me?”
“I promise you I will. I need to come and do some puzzles with you.”
She nodded, smiled and patted my hand. I stayed with Dana for another 15 minutes before she fell back to sleep. The nurses told me it was the most she’d been awake since she was readmitted. I vowed I would continue to visit with her while she was in the hospital. Those visits meant as much to me, as it meant to her. It made me realize I could be in Dana’s place. She also was a part of my healing process. She was fighting for her life. She helped me to realize I should not feel so sorry about mine.
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Does Bette wear heels when she’s in scrubs? Cough, cough…it occurs to me that Bette is someone who would have no need for nor even be tempted by an offer from Peggy to cover her tuition. I’m just saying. It sounds like in Carmen’s case Peggy did it out of affection, but in Dylan’s, well Peggy didn’t hold a gun to her head, did she? And doctors tend to be fairly well compensated so even a large loan wouldn’t be as onerous for Dylan. Maybe it wasn’t ‘nice’ of Peggy to make the offer, but it did reveal something about Dylan’s character, even if she later tried to give it back. At this stage I’m willing to think Peggy was trying to protect her daughter.
I like the sandwich idea!
Funnyone- I made a lengthy response to your comment and lost my connection so hear goes…Not all docs wear scrubs in the ER. Many wear regular clothes and some like the real doc who inspired the “new Monet” wears designer clothes and pumps. I didn’t get it but she was sexy as all get out. (She is a good friend and I do recall us streaking through a mutual friend’s house with bubbles covering all the important parts. She was big fun and could corrupt the most innocent of us. :-) )…..Bette does not need Peggy’s money. Her daddy is very well off. Not as big a dog as Peggy but Bette has no issues with money. (Are you implying something?)….While the debt is not onerous it is a big burden. The avg med student will graduate with a debt around $150K. Someone like Dylan with no family resources is probably coming out with quite a bit more. The avg resident salary is about $35-45K/year. Most residents have to moonlight to make ends meet when you add in living expenses to that student loan burden. Dylan is looking at 4 years as a resident. Then once she is done a salary of about $100K to start.. So she’ll be in debt for a bit…Her better deal would have been with Helena, if she trusted the relationship. Obviously Peggy caught her in a moment of weakness, and played her like a fiddle. Next post is Dylan’s side of the story.
S once again a well thought written chapter. I liked how Carmen was still with Helena as a friend and more, and this time Helena made sure to treat her as she needed to be, wth love and respect. Bette is now becoming more human thanks to Helenas advice and being a friend in need for Helena. And finally she woke up and saw that she was being selfish and also, see that life was worth fighting for, if Dana was doing it why not her? As for Dylan I say don’t even bother coming back, but then again Helena needs to face her in person and get it passed her and start a new life w/o Dylan. Great chapter S.
Oh, great! Now all I’m going to think about the rest of the night is that sandwich reference! You just love to torture me don’t you Squirl. Sounds as though our girl is making a come back (or maybe that’s next chapter – sorry I couldn’t resist – that sandwich reference has me all discombobulated.) Helena better stay strong – or Dylan better come up with a freakin’ good reason for taking the moola from Pegs. I am not at all surprised that Helena is over the top with her mum. Loving the story and I hope you are feeling better!
I don’t understand why no one ridiculed Helena when she disrespected Dylan by cheating but when Dylan did something wrong it’s like she’s the devil. Both of their doings where wrong but a least Dylan had the humanity to try and correct her mistake. I think that if Carman hadn’t stoped the affair Helena would have been fine with the situation regardless of who she hunt. I don’t have any sympathy for Helena. I couldn’t deal with the death that comes from working in medicine. I know that saving lives probably outway the bad but it still has to be hard. Squirl you’re just as mean as IC making Dana suffer with this horrible disease. What has she done to deserve this she the sweetest person in the story. :-(
RB–Wow to compare me to IC…I person I loathe…I think I may have shared this, perhaps I didn’t. When I was an intern, one of my colleauges was diagnosed with lymphoma.She was sweet, beautiful, absolutely the nicest person. She was engaged to the nicest guy. This is always a bad combo. We always joke that it’s the nice ones that die. The evil ones survive. Why I chose Dana to put her through the lymphoma diagnosis is for obvious reasons. Perhaps I would have chosen Lara (someone peripheral) or Jenny someone everybody hates, but either I would have no one care(Lara) or they’d be cheering on the diease(Jenny). A lot of people are quite upset about Dana having this disease and going through it because they are reliving her breast Ca. Perhaps I can do better than IC. But unfortunately bad things do happen to good people. My friend died 4 months after her diagnosis. Bad things do happen to good people. Keep cheering Dana on.
Bwahaha…I’m sorry, but did you say people would be cheering if Jenny was suffering such a fate? lol! Now that is horrible! Absolutely, bad things do happy to good people…and cancer is a…I don’t know what to say but I’m still rooting for Dana! Dana’s situation absolutely helps Helena put things into perspective. However with comments like, “It was nice to know I had another potential shoulder to cry on…” (What..ever! lol!). I’m suspecting that the thing that will truly keep her going is her new BFF reminding her that she’s still alive…one way…or another! lol!
Bubbles with Monet? I take it wasn’t champagne. Squirl, you naughty girl! OK, if Bette does go into dermatology, she can probably get away with the heels and designer clothes, but I’m thinking the ER could get a little messy and she better be able to jump back in those heels if she gets another GI bleed. Hell, just as a private citizen in NYC I wouldn’t wear clogs or sandals, because that was a place you sometimes HAD to jump back and fast! I wanted my damn shoes to come with me. Yeah, I know a little about student loans. Not as much as a med student, but then I’m twice their age. That sandwich sounded delicious. Could you make us one?
Yes indeed. Designer wear and the ER are not compatible..Bette will certainly learn this…The bubbles were not champagne although I think champagne may have been involved..hehehehe…Bette/Helena/Robin sandwich….Hmmmmm Bette is not that kind of girl…hehehehehe…Sorry no sandwiches to be made. Not anytime soon but it does sound mighty delicious.
After reading each chapter and your AN, I realize that I lead a boring, somewhat uncomplicated, relatively drama-free life. I love all the detail and texture to the storylines. Some people might consider that to be trivia/minutiae but for me, it makes the story alive and breathing.
Whew…I had a lot of catching up to do…so sad about C and H, but can’t say I am sad that D is gone, I mean really-what was that…but money talks…Is there a cure for Dana? Don’t take her away twice…okay loved all of the updates and medical stories…looking forward to the next post!!
Like most I too hate what Dana is going through, and would not wish for anyone to suffer from any illness or disease. But in real life I know it happens. Yes Dylan made a mistake. We all do. And student loans aren’t a joke. I have seen many people lives fall apart from them. But Dylan should have come clean. As for Helena she really has no room to talk. They both betrayed their relationship.