“And if I did?”

“Why would you do that?” Tina asked, her voice rising.

Eric’s face dropped it’s normally placid mask and she saw the sympathy and anxiety in his eyes. “Tina, I – I was trying to help you.”

“Help me? By spreading my business around the neighborhood and asking a stranger to befriend me? You thought that was going to help?”

“I thought you could use someone to talk to. You… you don’t talk to me,” Eric said quietly. “I’ve tried, but… Tina, you can’t stay in the state you’re in. Locked away from the rest of the world. I had to – to do something. And I didn’t tell her anything about… She asked me something about how safe it was around here because she ran in the mornings and I only said that you liked to run too, and maybe you and she could go sometime. That’s it.”

Tina’s anger subsided as quickly as it had flared up. “Oh. Alright.”

“I didn’t mean to upset you. The words were out before I really thought about it. I just thought if you had a friend… it might help you. You won’t talk to anyone else.”

“Forget it,” Tina said. “Don’t feel bad about it. It doesn’t matter.”

“It does matter. I didn’t mean to upset you. I never want to do that, Tina.” There was a little catch in his voice and his eyes were pleading.

“I’m not upset,” Tina said. She got up and set her plate in the sink. She left the dining room in silence and went into the living room, turning on the television and flicking through the channels until she found an old movie that looked like a Gothic romance. She heard Eric cleaning up in the kitchen, probably as a silent apology. Tina supposed he didn’t really have anything to be sorry for – after all, he was just trying to help, like he said. She didn’t have the energy to hold a grudge, anyway. But she was tired of hearing about how he was “trying” to make her feel better and “trying” to get her back to normal, whatever that was. She was beginning to suspect that he cared more about getting her back to the way things used to be for his own convenience, because he was tired of dealing with her sadness.

Well, that’s just too fucking bad. The more that he pushed, the more it was making Tina want to double-down in her misery and shove him and his meager attempts at fixing things – most of which he had pushed onto the new neighbor, instead of doing much of anything himself – away.

He came into the living room and sat down meekly, picking up some book or other, and began reading in silence. When the movie ended, Tina excused herself. She heard him flip on the sports channel as she made her way to the bedroom.

Tina crawled into bed and did some reading until her eyes were heavy. She drifted off and didn’t awaken until the next morning.

Eric was already gone when she woke up, but on the kitchen table was a box of four blueberry muffins from a deli she used to love. She knew that was Eric’s way. He did little things like this after their disagreements. Tina usually thought it was sweet, but today she didn’t.

She made some coffee to go with her muffins and sat down and ate one.

She took her time over her cup, not really inclined to do much today. Maybe she would lay out in the backyard. Get a little sun, a little color to her skin. Be lazy, for once. She made a snap decision and went into the bedroom and dug through her drawer for a bikini. After putting it on, Tina made a face at herself in the mirror. She was pale and soft. Her body didn’t really look like her own anymore. She supposed that she probably should start running again. Or working out, somehow.

Tina sighed, and looking down at herself, suddenly felt ridiculous. She put her clothes back on and wandered around the house, at odd ends. She paused for a long moment in front of the nursery door before passing on to the hall closet, where she dug around for a bit until she found her old running shoes. She took them and put them in her own closet in the bedroom. Just in case.