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Great Unexpectations Chapter 25
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"Sit up and take a look, Bette. And hurry", Tina said while frantically buttoning up her blouse and attempting to fix her hair. Bette finally recognized the panic in Tina’s voice and sat up quickly. Looking in the mirror at the line of vehicles waiting for them to move, her eyes opened widely. She found the other possible response and let it out loudly. "Oh shit!!"
In her haste to enjoy some afternoon delight Bette had neglected to pull the car over as completely as possible. She’d left the road only half-blocked, but it’s narrowness meant that it was fully impassable to any vehicle larger than a motorcycle.
She reached for the key and quicky turned it. The metallic grinding sound jarred them both fully awake now. "Fuck! What was that?", Bette called out. Tina laughed. "Babe, the car was still running. You put it in park, but never turned it off." Bette turned a variety of shades of crimson in her embarrassment. She abruptly slammed the car into drive and sped off down the road with the caravan of would-be onlookers following behind her. Bette looked desperately for another road to turn down. A two track would suffice. A darkened alley in the country’s most violent city would suffice. The Grand Canyon would suffice. Anything to get away from these people who insisted on following her.
She spotted a drive up ahead with a large wooden sign indicating the property. "Oh no. This is not good", Tina laughed reading the sign as they neared it. "Please don’t let this be where they’re going", Bette prayed out loud. An very ironic prayer as it would turn out. She pulled into the drive still hoping that the vehicles would pass right on by them, not having any desire to follow the sign.
That hope was short-lived as the line of vehicles turned also, following closely. Bette could not bring herself to drive any further. Even though there was no other drive she pulled over. Into the rough weeds on the side of the road. Over thick sticks and large stones. The dust she was worried about earlier now paled in comparison to the possible damage she was doing to her precious Saab. Such was her desperation to get away from these people. The car stopped and waited for the train of vehicles to pass them by. Three shuttle vans. Each with two canoes strapped to the roof. The writing on the side of the vans matched that of the large wooden sign. St. Mary’s of the Lakes’ Vacation Bible Camp. Bette and Tina turned their heads to avoid the stares of the children and their scandalized parents. It wasn’t until the second van passed that Bette realized her shirt was still open, buttons unfastened. She clutched at her blouse and pulled it closed as Tina continued to giggle. Bette became slightly annoyed with the hilarity that Tina found in this situation. "This is embarrassing for you too, Tina!", she scolded. Tina tried to behave and stifle her laughter, but as soon as the final van passed it revealed the large wooden sign again. Just reading those words sent Tina into fits of laughter
Bette rolled her eyes and pulled a quick u-turn to leave the property as quickly as humanly possible. Getting as much distance between them and that sign was priority one. After a few minutes of silence, silence punctuated only by Tina’s intermittent giggles, Bette began to grin. She finally spoke. "Well, Tina. If there was any doubt about it before, there shouldn’t be now. We are definitely going to burn in hell."
The gate was lifted and Tina could no longer contain her laughter. Bette could not help but join in. "Ok. Let’s go home, T."
TBC
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That was hot and funny.
That was pretty funny. Sorry about the Tigers. I really wanted them to win the Wildcard over the Yankees. This is a lesson to everyone.. don’t fall asleep after car sex. PPS.
Very silly but very funny and nicely written pps.
Funny and sassy. You may feel uncomfortable writing NC -17s but you do a fine job. PPS. If you do the crime, you have to do the crime. In this case, it was worth it. LOL. PPS.
Gratuitous sex for shits and giggles? Honestly it’s not really my thing, but let me read this to see if I still feel the same. :)
LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!! Definitely hot too. ;)
Very funny chapter!!!
I take back my comment about you not being nice, my dear red. You are too cute! Loved the gratuitous chapter… funny and oh so hot! Gotta love the car sex.
I don’t think God minded…She was probably looking down and laughing at them just like Tina was! You are too funny Red! Thanks you!
Too hot and too funny.
That was sooo funny and HOT. I am having to fan myself with my mouse mat…:0/ PPS
Damn, I wish I was on one of those vans. That was hot, steamy, and then funny as you know what. I know how you feel about the Tigers because the Cubs seem to be doing the same thing now.
That was hot and funny!
Very very clever!!! U r too much…hot also, extremely hot… that car sex always seems to get the fans going.
there’s always time for gratuitous sex in a serious writer’s life; just the right amount of levity coupled with the seriousness of the task they’ve undertaken; nicely sculptured!!!
That was very well written, so funny and hot. I can’t stop laughing.. PPS
Bible camp? Ha! Oh hell yeah, that was definitely worth whatever embarrassment they might be suffering, cos that was h-o-t. (And Bette’s poor Saab… ah well, worth it!) And what’s with all that angry horn-honking? I thought patience was a virtue? Thank you for indulging this horndog with the quick post, red. More when you can! (And commiserations on the Tigers, but it ain’t over til it’s over. Words I need myself… *both* of my teams got a drubbing yesterday.)
You know as a true Tribe fan I feel your pain but not too badly. I think Bette & Tina were just seeking a little devine intervention in their spontaneous expression of joy and happienss. They were just closer to the source then they realized. Watch those religious types they can come back to bite. Thanks for the great post.
Well done! I had to admit the summary was intriguing but I am so glad they “visited” the bible school the way they did! As for the Tigers, all I can do as a Michigander is grumble, or cry when I think of what happened to the Lions too! *grumbling* Good job on the story though….PPS.
Thank You! So funny & hot! Can’t wait for more. PPS!!
How can a scene that hot and funny ever be called gratuitous? It was infinitely more satisfying than the three seconds of Bette/Nadia car sex we got in S4. I love it when Bette frets about her precious Saab too.
Bravo, well done
Praise be for Bette and Tee!