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Hindsight – Chapter 12
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I saw her eyes were about to overflow, she looked away as the escape of her tears began…, my heart went out to her, I couldn’t believe that I had done this to her again, my simple words of telling her I needed to pop out had once again reduced her to tears.
I watched the slow descent of her tears, the droplet crawled down her cheek, it reached her lip, I watched her tongue peek from between her lips, taking in the salty droplet as I watched the cogs of her mind working.
I continued to look at her, my eyes pleading with her to believe me that I wouldn’t take her daughter away from her, that I would bring Angelica back in just an hour.
“Bette…”
“Yeah…”
“I promise that I will be gone for just an hour, all I want to do is to change Angelica, collect her stroller, grab us all something to eat and I will be right back, okay… its only one hour… no longer… I promise…”
She took a deep breath, her eyes closed slowly and reopened, she looked at me then as I saw her let the breath out that she was holding.
“Okay…”
She had said it was okay, but was it, was what I was asking her too much, too much for today, I saw the look still in her eyes, there was still doubt there, would she always doubt me, maybe…, maybe not…, but I knew that I had a lot of making up to do, and if that meant I had to back track here and now, then that’s what I would do if it meant she would begin to trust me once again.
“Bette…”
“Yeah…”
“What about if I left Angelica here while I go out and get what I need…?”
I saw the flash in her eyes, the disbelief, the joy, pure and utter joy…
“Would you… please…?”
“I’m sorry…” I hoped she would understand the apology, she always used to know, without me having to explain, I hoped she would still be able to do that as I apologised now.
She looked at me; her eyes were glassy as the thought of me leaving Angelica with her sank in, “I know…”
“Would you like her to stay the night tonight as well?”
“Yeah… I’d like that a lot…”
“We can work out a regular schedule, but is that okay for a start?”
“Absolutely…” she smiled through her tears, her smile was infectious, I smiled back at her as Angelica toddled toward us.
“Mama…” she was looking directly at Bette, her arms held aloft as her request to be lifted into her arms.
I saw her tears spill over as she bent to pick up Angelica and her green man, held tightly grasped in her small fist, they looked so much alike, I saw it everyday, but at times, just like it did now, it struck so much deeper, their eyes looking at one another, the innocent look of our daughter, looking into the adoring eyes of her mother…
“I’m going to go now okay…” I said to them both, looking from one to the other.
“Sure… an hour…”
“An hour…” I reply as I lean forward and kiss Angelica’s cheek, she looked at me as I backed away, she smiled at me, a smile that I hadn’t seen in a long time, and I knew what the smile meant, she didn’t have to say any words, but I knew as I looked at her that she would.
“Thank you…” she quietly said as our eyes remained locked.
“No need…” I said, and there wasn’t, I needed to make amends and I needed her to trust me, I hoped she would trust me…
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OOOOo you have to post again realll soon…..i cant wait much longer for updates on this fic….it is awesome……
One minute in B&T heaven with your other chapter and then this….mess!!! But I trust you, like I know Bette one day will trust T again :o)) Can you make 3 in one day???….No right, the boss is home LOL. Happy New Year sweetie :o))
wow..I can’t help it… but I have to say this…is Tina that dense??? She coulda just started by saying she had to go but she’d leave Angel…I mean Bette’s devastation is staring her in the friggin face…sorreee but!!!
… or even better, Rau… why not forget about the change of clothes, have some food delivered, and spend the day right there with Bette and Angel. *sigh* Tina… sometimes you don’t see what’s right in front of you. Jo… lovely as always…
Wait! I’m confused. Does Britain celebrate New Year’s a week after we in the new world? Does Angelica or Bette in any way resemble a green man? Oooohhh, the premier of the L Word a week into January! Oooohhh, Bette and Angelica resemble each other. I get it! Phew! Glad I figured that out. But you’re right of course Jo, a girl can dream, and SHOULD.
Wow Jo…another post. They have to be able to get that trust back. In a way if I was Tina I would be skeptical to leave Angelica there…since Bette is still weak and prone to fainting. Bette is so broken that it’s hard to see that Tina is being sincere…Jo you have your work cut out for you to get them to a place of love and trust. What about Henry? Isn’t he gonna object to Tina spending the night over Bette’s? Cause I am sure Tina isn’t gonna just drop Angelica off for the night.
those two will need some time to fix things but i ca see that they already started so i have hopes for the best for them
they are doing great and in the name of love they will find the way to be together i hope so. Happy new year!
WHY didnt Tina tell Bette I’m going to get Angie some clothes and some food and be back in an hour. You can keep her her and I will return with the stuff. Love it when Tina needs to eat a little crow. thanks
We need to see and read The Tina Kennard Redemption. Bette is always suffering but Tina not so much. Always well written. Thank you.
Azmama, as one author wrote: When Bette fucks up, she made to suffer. When Tina fucks up, Bette’s made to suffer. LMAO. I’m leaving it to Jo to make Tina a wiser person because it’s not going to happen on the show.
There is something that grabs my heart about this story and Linbooks’ Chiaroscuro. It tears up my insides to know that Bette is coming apart and only one person can make that pain go away. It may never go away totally but some bandaids and stitches my help save what is left and promote healing. Something that Bette said that it is not only Angelica that she wants to stay with her but Tina also. When Tina said she would be back after telling Bette that she would allow her to stay the night, Bette said something about an hour only. That leads me to believe that not only does she want Angelica in her life but Tina also. It would be nice if while Tina was away collecting Angelica’s things that she also collected some of her own and more than just a nights worth.
pms
Good chapter. B&T need to talk more and work thing out and be a family again. Hope Tina will dump henry soon. OK post soon please, thanks! HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!!!
Well a complete contrast to “Do you remember”…i hate to see Bette so vunerable..but im pretty sure you do to!!!!…and i know for all the heartache your putting her through in this story…there is definitly a healing process in the air, im glad Tina is leaving Angie with her…shows a little trust..So thats a start!
Jo I stuck to this story PPS!
So the writing ban has been lifted and we get all the benefit. I love this story, it’s so bittersweet.
Why do I have the feeling this will be the longest hour? lol
Yeah…what a contrast! Guess you’re taking a page from IC & Co. on how to add “unnecessary drama”–you’ve already got plenty here! I understand sky’s concern about Bette’s frail state and how it might not be a good idea to leave Angie there alone, even for an hour. But I know you’re gonna work it out because you don’t want to inflict any more pain on Bette–or your readers! Thanks for a great start to the new year, and PPS!
I hope you post more and more while S4 is ongoing….I’m sure we will need B & T in fanfic
I’m so behind on stories, and I was happily clicking ‘Next Post By Author’ only to find… dun dun dun… there wasn’t one!!! I love this story, and I’m glad to see Tina truly making strides to assure Bette she trusts her… step in the right direction, anyway.