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Hindsight – Chapter 2
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I glanced back at her, smiling at how she was so easily transported when she was asleep, knowing there would not be a stir from her until morning.
I stepped over the threshold back out onto the patio, I stood momentarily watching Alice as she knelt beside Bette, I could see she was crying, she was stroking Bette’s forehead as her tears fell, there was far more going on in the life of Bette Porter than any of them knew, and she knew that when Bette felt low, she shut herself away from everyone, including their friends, and it was just possible that Alice’s reaction to seeing the state Bette was in was a shock to her system as it had been to her.
“Are you okay Al?”
She merely nodded as she sniffed, she bent and kissed Bette’s forehead before standing beside me, she looked then, her pallor showing the effect of seeing their her friend at this low ebb had had on her.
“Have you seen her much lately?”
“No… she wouldn’t answer her cell, and whenever I called around there was never any answer. I can’t believe the state she is in…”
“I can, but I tried to ignore it…”
Alice looked into my eyes, seeing the emotion behind the words, I hadn’t been in contact with our friends much either, not in the last seven weeks and four days.
“Does Kit know she’s like this?” I asked her.
“Kit is the only one she’ll see or talk to…”
“After we get her inside, I’ll call her…”
She understood the meaning behind my words, she knew that I wasn’t ready for the full on conversation with Kit just yet, but I would do it because it should be me calling, no one else.
Between us we managed to gently lift the lifeless body that was our friend and my ex partner, both looking at one another at the ease in which she came into our arms, neither of us saying what was going through our minds, the thoughts running through mine of feeling how much weight Bette had lost, how ill she looked, how lost she was…
With Bette laid on the bed, next to the sleeping Angelica, we both stood, silently looking down at each figure. Alice was the first to speak, to break the silence in the air.
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you are so dang good. whew. i have to go cry.
My dear Jobadge… Your words have the ability to reach through one’s body and touch, wrench and shatter a heart… But you also give hope, that wonderfull ray of sunlight that can emerge from behind a dark cloud, evoking a rainbow… I am sure the rainbow you will show us will be marvelous, and I thank you from the botoon of my toucher, wrenched and shattered heart for the beauty of this story, for writing it and allowing us to share in this wonderfull journey of your mind! Thank you!
Wow, its the first thing that comes to mind. So much sadness and despair. Unfortunately at times it takes this kind of situation for people to realize the full affect of they’re actions and words. Hopefully Bette will not be angry with Tina being their, but happy that for whatever reason, not only is Tina their but so is Angelica. Hopefully, after much time and talking these two can realize that no matter what or whom, destiny is not something you can change, and they are destined to be together. Great job.
I have now read both chapters and let me say that you have moved me this story. I feel the love, and hurt of both these women. Thank you for such a wonderful story.
another excellent chapter, this is sad so sad too but this situation will help Tina to realize what she has done and then try to fix this because Bette deserves has her daugther, and Tina knows that
I’m going to add to smiley’s comment because I know how she feels. NOT only did Tina keep Angelica away for 2 months, but just TODAY she sees Bette faint and the bitch left her there. At first I thought this was going to read as though Tina were imagining seeing Bette when Angelica said “mama.” I really DON’T get it. Bette faints in a grocery store no less- and Tina walks away. Since walking away was so easy for her to do earlier, why bother to stay now? As deep as this chapter was, I have to say you were successful in pissing me off. PPSSSSSSSSSS!!!
Another thing, how dare Tina walk away when Bette fainted? Suppose she had seriously hurt herself? But you know even if she did go over I would still be pissed!(lol) As usual Tina’s head is in her ass and fails to see the shit right in front of her! What the kicker here is is that she now wants to see how Bette is doing and automatically become concerned about her well being after 7 fucking weeks?!? Is she insane?!?! Why this makes me so mad is that I can actually see Tina doing this! God I hope to high hell Kit gives her a tongue lashing. I mean I’m semi-glad that she is realing what she has done but it’s not enough, so please give Bette or Kit the voice to give Tina what most fans would have wanted to hear. Sorry Jo I had to get that out(lol), post soon!
Please…let me see my baby…How sad is that. I can’t wait to see whats next post soon.
my heart is breakin slowly…
I think you may be the only one to make my heart stop…you know my condition. ; ) Thank you for such an emotional story..I love it.
This was phenominal. We can only hope the powers that be think along the same lines as you and bring Tina to her senses. Great chapter. Thanks.
Well, you know how I love a bit of angst and that post had it by the bucket load. I think that may have been one of my favourite things that you have written. Really looking forward to where you are going to go next with it. How will Henry react when he finds out that Tina spent the night at Bette’s?
So much pain and anguish. Tina had to know how much damage she was causing. Now all of a sudden she has a conscience. Boo to you, Tina.
That was hearbreaking but amazing written
this chapter is so powerful. I was in tears when I read it. thank you!
beautifully written…the pathos of bette so explicit…please write soon.
Sad, but very nicely written
Dammm… this was so hard to read… both chapters… i don’t know what to say… you know i only want them together… but this is not the way … if tina just comes back because bette is drinking, smoking and not eating… they are still at square 1… nothing has changed… and what about henry… he may be a good old boy… but when he finds out tina spent the night… hmmmmmmmm… well Jo… i look forward to your next chapter…
Wow…what a powerful chapter…so hard to read, but worth every minute. Please be gentle with them both and let them work their way back from this painful situation. great writing…I love it! PPS
Damn that was sad and you made my cry my friend and I never cry alot in on chapter but you did. Damn this is bad and hurt and I agree with AmandaMG and let see what’s next, thanks!
Wow that was really intense.
Wow that was really intense.
It’s amazing how deep we can hurt the people we love the most. TIna is justifying it as “protecting ” her and Angelica from being hurt, but I think she just wants to continue punishing Bette. I hope Tina realizes that the harm she is causing to Bette is affecting Angelica. It’s time to begin the healing process.They both need to forgive in order to move forward. Beautifully written. PPS.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS MAKE ME CRY? THANK YOU JOBADGE
So, so sad…Bette’s despair and Tina’s initial running away! But she couldn’t just run away, because love conquers all! This is deep, Jo, and I think you’re just starting to scratch the surface…
Seems there’s some hope for the saving of Tina’s soul and Bette’s life, but crap, look what it took to get that woman to discover her conscience. In the great cosmic scheme of things, Tina’s got some serious ‘slpaining to do. But it’s a start and as they say the longest journey begins with a small step. And it will be a long journey as the woman is a moral retard.
This was definitely one of your top 3 chapters. Your writing is so rich, layered and profoundly sad. How can people who love each other so much be so cruel? Tina is a pimp, a stone cold pimp.
This is a sad day…my heart aches.
ps: Jo, thanks for talking ally out of whatever bad thing she was planning!
Thank you for Tina’s POV. She does have a heart and it still beats wildly for Bette Porter. Now if she can just rid herself of all of those childhood notions and run back to the one person that heart still beats for. Bette has fallen but this time Tina is there to pick her up. Tina’s actions led to this break down of Bette’s but she is there now to slowly raise that sinking ship.
Thanks for Tina’s side. At least here we get to see what she thinks & feels, unlike the show. That was an amazing chapter. Thanks for takin the time.
Ouch.
So sad, but I can’t wait to see Bette’s reaction when she wakes up next to Angie.
Fabulous story, lets hope B&T can find away back to each other. I am glad Angie will be there to see Bette. Please post again soon.
wow… this chapter hurts.. great writer.. please post again soon..
I had first thought that this story was on it’s own, and only after your reference to the oysters did I realize that they were connected. Thankyou for sparing us the gorey details of their demise. I wouldn’t have been able to read the chapters of their downfall, as detailed as your were with their reconnection I know that it would have been the same with their seperation and that chills me to the bone. I feel safe kowing that your writing and will take care of this couple, as only you can. It’s sad to think that they could go from one happy place to let it all unravel again and wind up here. Thanks jobage, pls take care of the girls!! Your stories are amazing, just amazing, thanks
That was so heartbreaking. But I’m glad that Tina is there – now it’s up to her to make everything right, although she’s got a long hill to climb. Beautifully written.
Damn! A sew lumps caught in my throat! That was painful to read! Tina is a fucking bitch! Yeah I said it but I have no other words to describe her at the moment. Granted what Bette did was wrong but she brought her back in a few hours. This bitch takes her away for almost two months and thinks Bette would not be affected by it!!! Of course she was not thinking only in the capacity that she wanted to hurt Bette and boy did she completely eviscerate her achilles heel! I mean damn Tina, your behavior is just so fucking disgusting and for a brief moment wished for bodily harm to come to you. Okay rant over! For the sake of my sanity I adamantly REFUSE to connect this story to “I thought…” and “Do you rememeber…” Excellent Writing Jo, you continue to astound me! You must be an awesome person to know and I am so glad you share your talent with us. Post soon! I can’t wait for that conversation!
That was good….
Well done!! That was heartwrenching…but beautifully written. Thank you.
holy cow. i don’t think i’ve ever been so close to crying at a fanfic before. GREAT writing. can’t wait to see how this progresses.
Jo, I come here everyday to see if you post something, honey… Your write is so painful, so tender, so full of details, so gentle. You know how to do a great dramatic scene and you know how to tell, better then anybody else here or everywere, a tale from the girls… Post soon or i´m going to be sick :) Thanks sweet.
Gosh! This is painful and difficult to read. Your writing is awesome Jo.
wow, you really are a talented writer, you have us all so hooked in to this story!!!!great job!!!!
Jo, That chapter bled emotional hurt and pain.I do get the sense that Tina is trully appreciating the effect that keeping Angelica has had on Bette. She is seeing first hand the disect of Bette’s heart and soul. In seven weeks and four days Bette’s life has reverted to basics of survival. Food (limited) and shelter. Tina now know what she must do and hopefully is beginning to realize what she has lost. I just hope that Bette has left a trail to find her way back. Your words convey the sense of failure and deficiency that has invaded Bette’s psyche. Functioning is all that was left. I adore the simiplicity with which you have had Tina face these demons and stand firm as she attempts to rebuild Bette and their realtionship. Brought me to tears. Perfect desolation! Many thanks for this emotional and emotive tale. Your Loyal Fan.
The road is going to be long and hard.
What???? No way, Can this be a continuance from remember when, But it is isn’t it? This story has me heartbroken. (I think I am forgetting this is fanfic) Its all about the story right? And the shock value, Well I am hooked, might let the chapters add up, Cause it is so sad.
This is so heartbreaking and sad but all the same brilliant and beautiful. If I had to comment on all the things I love in your writing and in this post, then this comment would be as long as the chapter :o)) But let me start by saying I love how you’re writing this chapter from Tina’s pov and showing she is only human (I think some readers has forgot)……The connection you very smooth made with your previous story was a stroke of genius, even if it wasn’t planned lol……I loved the way both Bette and Angle was sighing in sleep when T kissed them and Alice’s reaction to Bette was just what I had in mind – so was the way you described Bette not sleeping in her bedroom…..I think Tina has to be completely honest with Bette forward, its not okay saying she has not been listening to Bette’s messages and being mean about Bettes bruise and ask if she was drunk!!! And what about Henry, I doubt he’ll understand Tina staying the night?? Tina has definitely had a rude awakening, which was very needed!!! But I’ve hope cos Tina has realised her wrong behaviour and mistakes and knows she has to be there for Bette, not only tonight, but in the future as well. I’m looking forward to Bette waking up next to her daugther – I’ve faith in you to take care of our girls….BTW so sad to see the Levis being removed like that.
it was difficult to read, so much pain in them both, so much lost time…but i see hope
WOW!!! JUST WOW!!!!! PPS
Wow this by far is the deapest story I have read. Great job, I luv your writing. I didn’t know if I could handle it, but I can’t wait for more.
This is SO painful to read. Just… ouch… It’s hard to imagine Bette like that, but, at the same time, it’s really the only plausible state I can see her in given the circumstances. I also think that there’s a glimmer of hope, given that Tina sees she needs to be there more than just that night. I’m just not sure how long it will take for them, or how willing Bette will be to let Tina back in, though I think she’d do it for Angel. Can’t wait to see more, even if it is heart-wrenching.
Very intense and sad,It would be easy to dislike Tina in this, but for now will give her the benifit of the doubt….She has alot of making up to do!