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Hindsight – Chapter 29
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“T… baby…, I’ll wait for you forever…” she smiled at me, leaning closer still, as I realised she was about to kiss me, I turned my head slightly, deflecting her lips as they landed on my cheek.
She pulled back to look in my eyes questioningly, obviously wondering why I had turned my lips from her, but I couldn’t just step back into that intimacy with her…, could I, I was meant to be with Henry, I was in a relationship with someone else…
“I… can’t do that… I’m sorry…”
“Why…?” she questioned.
“There are things… I need to… take care of Bette…; I just can’t step back to how things were…”
“I uh… I’m sorry; I didn’t… mean to push you…” I saw her eyes well as she apologised, she stepped back from me, I felt her uncomfortable ness, I didn’t mean to push her away, I didn’t mean to give her signals that we could step back to where we once may have been, I hoped that she understood that there were things for me to sort out in my life, before any contemplation of stepping back into Porter zone…
Would I fall in love with her again, was it possible to fall in love with someone when you were already in love with them, I smiled at her, I didn’t want to push her away, I wanted her to have hope, believe in that hope…, I had hope, she had given it to me…
“Its okay…, it’s just…” I wanted her to understand that we needed to do it differently this time…
“I know…” she hesitated, her mind obviously processing the happenings of the last minutes, “I understand…”
“I’m sorry…”
She sighed but she also smiled at me, “there’s no need…”
She was so understanding, why was she so understanding when I had wrecked her life, taken her daughter away from her, how could she not even treat me with the contempt that even I was beginning to feel at my own behaviour…
Could it have something to do with the declarations that we had just made…, I had never thought I would hear myself say those words to her again…
I looked at her face, searching the face that haunted my every moment…, god… I loved her so much, she returned the smile and it reached her eyes, she loved me…, I loved her and she loved me back…, she told me she would love me forever…, she would wait for me forever…
I wanted to feel her close to me, I slip my hand into hers, allowing our fingers to entwine, just like they used to… the soft touch of our palms meeting, our fingers embracing their mates, I squeezed her hand in mine, letting her know everything that was in my heart, I suddenly felt the need to tell her too, I looked up into her eyes, I whispered to her as I glanced from her lips, those lips has been so close, “I love you Bette…”
I leaned into her, looking into her eyes as I let my lips meet hers, I saw the surprise in her eyes, she had tried to kiss me only a moment ago and I had turned my cheek, I wouldn’t do that to her again…
I knew there was a long road ahead of me, and later… later was going to difficult, I would have to go back to where I had been living with Henry…, I would have to tell him…, tell him I couldn’t do it any longer, not with him…, not with any man…
I couldn’t go on lying to myself…, I had been lying to myself in that I thought I could follow this path in my life…, I couldn’t follow any path in my life unless she was by my side…
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Bloody right, Tina. Time to stop living the lie, and start *really* living. I’m still a bit giddy from the last chapter, and well, it’s carrying over to this one. More, Jo. As soon as, please.
Awesome Love It
Too short, but oh, it was worth it. You got that right Tina, time to go tell Henry bye,bye, and get back to where you belong. Jo, could you go write for IC.
Tina finally came to her senses. Hopefully, this will actually happen on the show. Once a TiBetter, always a TiBetter.
You see? It’s flowing. And yes a loooot of dance… :P Now I am looking forward to know where you are going with this story.
Ed is pleased :o)) I’m in Porter zone too….think it has somthing to do with my name LOL – great post!!
Excellent… had been and will always be waiting on end for the next chapterThank you
Another great update…Nice one!
There never was an escape, Tina. You can’t get away. Oh god, the Porter zone! Do they sell day passes for that place yet? Sigh, oh well… So lovely. So hopeful. Makes NY so happy. Thanks, Jo!
great update Jo. I agree with coop, you should write for IC. your writing flows so wonderfully!
It took her long enough, but Tina has finally realized she has found her everything!. Enough of hiding from her true love. Glad to see her making her way home.
absolutely beautiful :)
Hark! The Truth has been spoken! Frankly it’s still a little difficult to fathom exactly how Tina got her head so completely and utterly up her ass, but she’s pulled it out now, so good for her.
Thank you, thank you, thank you for making Tina see the light. Please send IC a copy of this story so she has a clue how to bring them back together!
Brava. The truth will set you free. Go Tina.
Yay! Any chance of skipping the chores again for a day and writing some more? *puppy dog eyes*
Looks like the light bulb went off in Tina’s head at the right time. It seems that the bulb was dimmed but now it is brightly shinning.
it’s about time they both admitted the truth, now let’s the healing begin
Awesome as always !!!!!
Ahhhh… this made me smile. You’re gifted, Jo… mindblowingly talented! LOL… thanks.
Lovely…. please post again SOON!!
oh whoah great moment….more
Finally Tina came to her senses!!! (doing a happy dance!) it was worthy all the time that Bette have been living because at the end she will have her Tina back
Jo, More hope and heartache. Good to read that Tina is believing in her heart again and following it to a point. After everything that these gals have been through some good old fashioned chatting has been long over due. Being open and honest with yourself is the first step as then you can follow through with others. Getting your head around it all does take time and effort. I think that Tina will appreicate Bette’s support and comforting however she knows that only she can sort it out. Bette has been wonderful as she sees a glimmer of hope and is heartened by it but also willing to give Tina the reins in dealing with their current situation. Your wise words just flow and rock your reader. Wonderful writing as always. Much Thanks for this chapter, Your Loyal Fan.
That’s it Tina! You go girl! Great chapter Jo.
Oh yeah, Getting even better now Jo.pps
WOW!!! That was Great!!! Tina and Bette should take things slow. Thanks PPS
Wow this is so good and can’t wait to see B&T back together again!!!!!!