Before I fell for her, I often wondered how does a person know they’re in love, what is it they feel, does it just occur to them that they’re in love or is it a gradual, building feeling. Now don’t get me wrong, its not something I spent a lot of time pondering over, analysing, it just often occurred to me, being the curious person I am. Heck I had boyfriends and girlfriends lining up, but I never with any of them thought for a second I was in love. That is hardly surprising when you take into account my astonishingly bad taste in lovers, who either treated me like crap and cheated on me or smothered me so much it just got well plain irritating. I would see my friends pairing up and giving each other the doe eyes, like those in love do. On the outside I made the sarky comments, rolled my eyes, the usual stuff one does when they pretend not to give a damn. Inside though my heart ached for that feeling everyone else around me seemed privy to, why was I not allowed into the secret of love. I realise now however that when you find it so hard to love yourself you can hardly expect to feel true love. I know that sounds like an old cliché, but its true, until you allow yourself to be fully open to someone, to realise that you are worth someone’s love and that you have the ability to give them your love, you will never truly know or feel what love is like. That has to be one of the hardest lessons I have ever had to learn and without her I might never have learnt it. I could never see past my imperfections, and believe me there are many, to see the good in me. It is amazing how easy it is to hid insecurities by being the life and soul of the party, using humour as a shield. She seen through it all, she knew the insecurities there were inside me, she was my best friend before she was my lover so she knew all there was to know. There was always a part of myself I held back from everyone else, but she broke down all my walls, at times when she looked into my eyes I was sure she could see straight into my soul. You see Dana, my Dana had the ability to reach straight into my heart with just a whispered word or a soft touch.