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Oasis Part 10
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Instead I whispered with all the love and tenderness I felt for this woman, “I love you.”
We broke the hug, and she walked me to the car telling me about how well Jazz night is. Trying to convince me to sing. To sing on stage in front of all of those customers, and my friends. She sets herself the highest of tasks. While it’s true that us Porter’s do not like to fail, there are times when one has to acknowledge a lost cause and this was.
On the way home, Helena wanted to convince me to let her stay the night.
“Not tonight Hels,” I murmured “I’m just gonna go to bed, listen to some André Rieu and try and sleep.” I didn’t want to hurt her, but I had. She looked like I had taken away her favourite toy, or denied her dessert. It felt like I had done both, and so much worse.
Never one to let the hurt linger, at least openly, she walked me to the door and made sure I made it inside okay. To the outside world, it looked like we were on a date, trying to decide if we were going to kiss, if I was going to invite her in for coffee; bed sports.
We hugged goodbye, something I was sure was a disappointment to the woman who was watching us from across the street. I never knew that people actually peeked on the world from between the blinds, art does imitate life after all.
Yawning, I stretch. It is really time for me to get ready. Checking the clock I start; I have let 20 minutes past lost in the day dream of the night before. Quickly I pull together my underwear and a towel so I can have a quick shower.
Helena and I walked up to the electronic doors, and stood there. I hated this place, there was something daunting about the idea that the doctor lived in a glass house. A place that is as fragile as it is opened.
It wasn’t really a glass house I guess, there were solid walls but I remember being in a room here, looking out into the world from behind glass. It was a distance that scared me, because all I wanted was to jump from that window. Not so I could fall to my horrible and screaming death… that wasn’t me.
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Hi, sweet Deean! Holy wow! We are speechless. We never expected Bette to have experienced Cancer. Indeed it is a serious topic. It affects not only the individual who has it, but the ripples of pain expand to her/ his friends and family. No wonder Bette has so many dreadful thoughts and doesn’t want to be pitied. However, she has to understand that her friends and family’s concern is her well being, because they love her. We also believe that while she has been in contact with hunger, war casualties, death and tragic events, they all have a certain influence to depress her attitude. We certainly hope that with the necessary help and the solid support of those around her, that she will be able to overcome the dark place where she is right now. The medical check up is a MUST, if she wants to make sure the illness hasn’t returned. Thanks for this brilliant update. PPS Hugs and kisses on both your cheeks – Lucero & Marsha (Proud Salsa Aunties to the ever loving JC and Eunichick)
hel is such a good friend im nervous at the results of this appointment.cant wait 4 more
Oh NOOOOOO, Bette has been sick with this for a long time. That is one reason that she was seeing the world and trying to be happy. Dang, thanks for friends like Helena,and the rest of the gang for being there,and for Kit for just loving her. She really has some true friends.they are hard to find. thanks
I knew it, I knew it!! I was sure she had HIV though, and never thought of cancer. I am pretty sure though, that if it were back, it would show up in the blood work that she would have had earlier. Helena is the best sister friend. I still say, about the others, it’s still Bette’s life, and she has to be able to live it on her terms, not theirs. I also have to say, T…T..TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS….. for BOOTS? I am with azmama, be nice to my imaginary Bette!
all this cause she hugged Jenny in Season 5? wow. i need a hug.
When I first read the author’s note, I misread it and thought it said, “you’re all GERMS.” I thought that was a strange thing for Deann to say! Gems is much better!
You can’t post quick enough…..
I knew it! Bette is sick and has been sick before. She knows the signs and was trying her best to ignore them. Helena won’t let her do it though and that’s a true friend. I love this story and will wait patiently for your next chapter. Thanks!
I knew it had to be something more serious than a cold or pneumonia. I hope she doesn’t die. There’s enough sadness in this world and I don’t like it when serious shit happens to my imaginary friends.
Hello My Beautiful Dee… I am brought to tears by this chapter of your beautiful story… it holds so many memories… so many truths… so much rawness and so much intensity … something I have come to appreciate from you… I won’t go into to many details as I’m sure you are already bogged down ;) ;) with my mundane meanderings… but just know you are completely amazing… Love and Hugs, Always and Forever, JC (Latin Nephew to those Salsa Angels and ever loving Cuzzie to the ever talented Eunichick)