Bette continued, “And there’s also…”

“I’m not asking that you stop seeing her.” Tina interrupted gently.  “I’m just asking you to consider me.  Consider us.”

Was it too selfish?  To want something when Bette may have found someone who would make her happy?  To insert herself into that mix of possibility again? 

”If I didn’t think I could be the one for you…" the one who would and did love her completely.  No one would feel for Bette as much as she did.  That was a certainty.  She knew there would be no one else for her too.  "That you were my forever.”

Tina stumbled, “I wouldn’t …” she didn’t need to finish.

A small noise came from the kitchen sink that still needed attention.  Other than that, it was quiet.  The silence benign.  It wasn’t filled with impulsive promises or agreements. 

Angelica stirred.  The most important reason for caution called out for Bette who turned to her companion.  “I need some time to think about it,”  she said.

“That’s all I ask.”  Tina confirmed. 

Wrapped in the hope that her former partner would be open to the idea of them again,  she thought silently, ‘Please be my forever.’  Leaning forward she lay her head on Bette’s shoulder, stealing a moment before she left to attend to their baby’s call.  

With the assurance of their closeness, Tina whispered the sentiment that resonated within.  "I need you." 

Familiar words of longing, Bette’s own words in fact, for the brunette to realize the depth of Tina’s desire to recommit.  Promises that should be enough to assuage any doubt.  But today…

Today…

“I told you I should be alone for a while” Bette inarticulately disclosed.  Drowning the words in her throat as if the sadness and uncertainty she’d voiced in the observation were transgressions. 

Bewildered and frustrated, she reached for the handle and opened the door quickly to step out into the open space.  She took a full breath.  Still, there didn’t seem to be enough to fill her lungs.  Bette slammed the door promptly, with a force akin to that which burned in the pit of her stomach. 

The physical exertion seemingly deflated her vigor.  Turning to her left she jadedly raised her body up onto the curb. Tempted to proceed down the path she stilled.  Waiting for Tina to join her on the sidewalk before she took more steps that led deeper into the peaceful setting that wholly contradicted the inner turmoil.

They walked slowly.  Beside one another though they didn’t touch. 

Considerable minutes passed before she spoke again.  With care Bette evenly asked, “Do you still want him?”

“Henry?” Tina questioned although immediately replied without concurrence, “No.  It’s over with him.”

“You know that.” She stated simply.

Darker eyes found Tina’s. “That’s not what I meant.”  She looked away, searching the distance for the answer only her partner and time would reveal.

“I mean…” she paused before aborting their advance just as they approached a curve that led to a shaded area courtesy of trees that lined the border of the track where they stood.

“Him,” she whispered tersely. 

The feel of him.  The idea of him.  A different future.  Another life.

Being with someone who, in theory, could give Tina all that she could want on a physical plane.  Not arguing what was more fulfilling – conventional or same sex unions.  Plainly, there was something extraordinary in the expression of physical want regardless of the combination.  Profound emotion would of course make the experience more fulfilling.  More meaningful.

Yet point of fact, the softness between them notwithstanding, there would be no lacking in the act of sex.  He would fulfill her desires as she would too with shared caresses.  There would potentially be even more.  Flesh, hers and his in the being that could result from their relations.  Carrying their features, sharing their blood.  There would be no need to explain.  The child would be, in the strictest sense, theirs.

Moreover, the idea of a traditional union.  The interaction that would be inherently different to what the women had.  Being with someone who Bette could never be.  Ever.

“Bette, I’m here knowing I can’t be without you.” Tina beseeched with furrowed brows.  “I want to be with you.” 

Hoping and believing that the feeling was mutual she asserted delicately, "It’s always been you."