This story has been set to a rating of R. Age verification is required to proceed.
Tina stared at her reflection in the bathroom mirror as tears streamed down her cheeks. She didn’t know what to do or how to move forward with Bette. She kept replaying their conversation and one particular part was on loop in her heart.
“I’ve been struggling with trying to reconcile my hurt. Shane told me I needed to figure out which was bigger…the hurt or the love.”
“And have you? Figured it out?”
“No, I haven’t.”
“Oh. But…so what I’m hearing you say is that you still love me.”
“But the hole you left in my heart is still there.”
“I know it is. And if given the chance, I will mend us.”
“I don’t know if it can be fixed.”
“We can try.”
“I don’t know if I want to try.”
“Oh,” Tina said as tears sprang to her eyes.
The tears came faster while Tina gripped the marble countertop with her left hand and covered her mouth with her right hand to stifle her sobs. She closed the bathroom door securely and slowly walked into the steam billowing from the shower as it began fogging up the mirror. Tina stood directly under the water and lifted her head up with her eyes closed. The hot water mixed with her hot tears.
“So, you don’t want me anymore?”
“Of course, I want you. Yes, I want you. I never stopped wanting you. But you forgot that part when you were making me out to be the villain,” Bette barked.
The water was soothing on Tina’s face. The echoes of Bette’s words were not so soothing.
“Don’t you understand? I miss us. But I don’t know if we can ever get us back. I want to slam you against these obscenely huge windows and fuck you for hours. I want you to scream my name. I want you to make me scream. But that’s not going to make us better. Is it? It’s only going to confuse the situation.”
Tina remembered how big Bette’s eyes got. That was one of her defense mechanisms. To make her eyes big and stare with this stern look on her face. Tina usually found it endearing. As a matter of fact, Tina remembered laughing the first time Bette tried it on her. But there was no laughter tonight. Tonight, Bette’s eyes broke her heart into a gazillion pieces.