I closed my eyes, letting the realisation come:

"I’m in love with Alice."  I’d finally said it.

She let out a shuddering breath, and when I opened my eyes I saw that she was crying silently.

"Wh-When exactly did you feel this, Dana?! After you dumped her? Before I moved in with you?" She spat out the words, and I welcomed her desire to hurt me. I needed it.

“It’s only been recently.” I said, trying to keep my emotions in check.

Lara sat back, throwing her hands up. “Well, that’s ok then… Jesus, Dana…” Then she looked at me, something crossing her mind like a shadow. “Something happened between you last night didn’t it?”

I wasn’t expecting the question in that moment. I bowed my head, biting my lip.

“Dana?”  Lara hissed, she put her head in her hands and was silent for a moment. I took a breath; the room so still around us. It was like the second before thunder strikes.

“You fucked her didn’t you?” Her blazing eyes belied the shake in her voice. “While I was worried sick about you, you fucked her, and then you came home and gave me some shitty excuse like I meant nothing… nothing.”

I rubbed my eyes, feeling the hot tears start to fall.

“I’m sorry, baby, I’m sorry…”

She batted my hands away from her, choking back sobs.

“No you aren’t, Dana!”  Then she stood, moving as far away from me as possible. “I want you to go.”

I nodded blindly.  “If-if that’s what you want.”

She wheeled on me. “None of this is what I wanted!”

I grabbed a few things and then went to the door. My insides were twisted into knots. This is it. I paused, but Lara didn’t turn around: her shoulders stiff and her arms tightly wrapped around her. I ached to comfort her, but that was something I had denied myself when I started this thing. I walked out of the apartment, feeling unreal, like a character in soap or something. Remember Al, I told myself, there’s a chance for you now. Could I trust myself not to fuck it up again?  Would it be different this time? My train of thought was broken when my cell rang. It was Shane.

“Dana?”

Her voice sounded tense.

“Hi-“

“Are you at Alice’s?”

I stopped walking.

“No, why?”

I heard her sigh.

“I just thought after last night- Are you ok?”

I tried not to cry, but the wave of emotion wouldn’t be held back.

“I-I think Lara and I are over- I-“

 “Shhhh. Dane. It’s alright, it’ll be ok.”

There was a pause and I could hear Carmen’s voice in the background.

I sniffed. “I’m sorry, Shane…”

“Don’t be. If you’ve done what’s in your heart, then you’ve done the right thing, ok?”

I had a sudden thought that cut through the tears.

“Have you spoken to Al?”

“What? No, that’s why I called you; I thought you two had gone AWOL or something…”

A cold sense of dread ran down my spine.

“Why?”

“I’ve been trying to call her for ages, but the line’s dead.” Her voice sounded concerned now. “You definitely aren’t with her?”

“No.” I said in a whisper. “Did you go to her place?”

“Yeah, no answer… What are you thinking?”

Ethan. Oh god, Ethan…

I started running. “I gotta go…”

“Dane! Wait! You think she’s ok…?  Shit. Look I’ll meet you there, alright?”

I rang off and increased my pace. Please don’t let that bastard have hurt her… please.