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    Planet Terror: The One With Jackie Brown

    Story written on September 30, 2007 by helebette.
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    1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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    Number of Comments: 12
    Words: 2799
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=67041
    Author Notes:

    kit is way too cool for skool; shane makes out with another dark haired beauty and does a jerky thing coz she can’t help it (metaphors); bette and helena get busy against the wishes of the church

     

    Scratch off the broken skin,
    Tear into my heart,
    Make me do it again…

     

    “Guys, turn this fucking shit song down!” Alice walked in, a grumpy expression on her face. Lara had given her a lecture on how it was ‘her’ turn to clean their room, and Lara was tired of doing all the cooking and cleaning, and so on. Alice knew she wouldn’t be having sex again if she didn’t start doing more, and it made her pissy.

     

    She flicked off the stereo, breathing a sigh of relief.

     

    “Oh shit…” She finally took in the scene in full. “Shane…Aikane?…”

     

    Alice unholstered the gun at her hip and raised it.

     

    “Shoot me.” Aikane said.

     

    “No, wait…just…let’s think about this.” Alice aimed at Shane who lumbered toward her. “Shaney, stay back. Come on, don’t make me do this…Aikane, go get the needles.”

     

    “The cure is obviously fucked Al..” Aikane pressed her hand to her bleeding shoulder.

     

    “Now, now, the cure is not so bad,” Alice joked, still training her gun on Shane’s head. “I do like ‘Friday I’m in love’…fucksakes, get BACK!” Alice shot Shane in the shoulder.

     

    “Alllll….” Shane started to sob, curling into a ball on the floor.

     

    “Oh, Shane, I’m sorry…dammit…” Alice swore softly as Aikane ran past Shane and out the door with her. “We’re going to leave you in here.” Alice shouted. “We’ll be back.”

     

    Meanwhile…

     

     

    “Babe, pass the chocolates…and a refill, if you will…” Bette gestured with her empty wine glass. “I like this part…hehehe…MerMAN!” She shouted at the screen. Derek Zoolander was cracking her up, though they had started the movie half an hour into it. Outside, dusk was approaching.

     

    Helena refilled her glass, glancing outside. “Sweetheart, I think we should get going. We can watch the rest of Zoolander another time. Crass American humor…tsk tsk…Derelicte indeed.”

     

    “Ummm…Milaaaa…remember her zombie movies?” Bette ignored her girlfriend for the time being. After a few minutes, however, she sighed and got up, dressing slowly. “Thank you for a lovely birthday hun…” She was almost shy as Helena—still fully nude—embraced her lovingly.

     

    When they walked back into the hospital, they encountered Dylan first.  She wasn’t aware of the drama unfolding with Alice and Shane and Aikane, but she did know of some other interesting news.

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    Comments

    1. Peggy has a way with understatement. Now that’s what I’m talking about! Let’s get back to them scary, lunging zombie roots. And I just want to state for the record that even thought it was Shane that administered the bite, I blame Jenny, that whinny little bitch. Maybe not logical, but hell, what’s logical about this story? And Jenny sucks.

    3. Noo me no like scary lungy zombie roots, whatever they are!! Peggy must not get chomped,but might I volunteer jenny for it instead? So infection is immediate, and what happened to Shane after Alice shot her? What would an infected My Little Pony do??

    5. Nooo! You didn’t just leave it there! Poor Shane. That rubbish cure…. oh no, what about the bionic ones? And what if Jenny turns back too? I’m all frightened now. (but lol @ at the infected My Little Pony….) more hb…

    6. When confronted with zombies, only Peggy Peabody would be so calm. You’ve just made my day with an awesome post and a reference to another one of my favorite movies…jackie brown. PPS

    7. oh lovely people, i can’t make *everyone* bionic, can i? kit, peggy, the baby…hmmmm…it just seems like too much, no? i will consider it. i am also considering taking pictures of My Little Pony and doctoring them to look gory and deadish. muahahahaha

    8. I would love to see the bionic baby in action =P and if I could vote, I’d vote for Jenny and the voices in her head show, I guess I’m the only one who likes Jenny LOL PPS!

    10. If Peggy MUST be chomped on, rather than seeing her converted into a zombie, I would prefer that she went the Belena bionic route. I suspect Helena would find the prospect of Mummy with superpowers somewhat dismaying.

    11. Oh and I forgot to say that I LOVE Bette and Helena gettin busy..I hope they get busier, but Peggy getting chomped might put a damper on that…so no chomping Peggy!

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