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Random Act – Chapter 11
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I watch again as her eyes continue their descent and hear her moan when she sees the dildo Im wearing. I decided on the thick, extra large variety. If Im going to pound something into her I want her to feel it with each stroke. I want her to strain to take it in and let it out. I get wet thinking about it and Im ashamed. I want to hurt her yet I love her. What have I become?
I crawl onto the bed and hover over her. She smells like my Tina and looks like my Tina but my Tina would never want this. Nor would she ask me to do this. I move in and kiss her roughly and she kisses me back. Our tongues do the dual they have done so many times before and I lose track of what Im suppose to be doing. I get lost in the familiarity of it and relax for just and instant. My relaxation is shattered when I hear her whisper in my ear; I want your cock inside me now. Fill me up with it. I pull away from her in that instant and look into her eyes. They are lust filled. I know mine are not. I move down her body and do a perfunctory nibbling and sucking of her breasts and nipples. She moans and lifts her hips up so she can rub herself against the dildo. I reach down to feel her with my fingers to insure she is lubricated and ready. She is beyond wet and I find myself mentally cursing her to hell. I raise up on my hands look her dead in the eyes again and stroke into her with all my might. She moans a combination of pain and ectasy and throws her head back. I stroke almost all the way out and in again. She wraps her legs around my torso and begins to raise her hips to meet mine. She is talking now thats it, fuck me, fuck me hard, oh God, I need, I want. Bette I love you. Silence as she peaks and her whole body tenses.
I collapse on her and bury my face in the crook where neck and shoulder meet. I cant stop the tears now or the sobs and I really dont care. It is no consolation to me that she said she loved me because to me this wasnt making love to her. Perhaps some would consider it love making but Ive never used a strap on before and will never do so again. Or will I? If she asks and it will keep her with me will I? God I am so lost.
Baby whats wrong? Why are you crying?
I roll off of her and turn away to sit on the side of the bed. You shouldnt have to ask.
Please look at me Bette.
I cant. I dont even know you anymore.
I unhook the strap on and remove it from my body. I lean down and pick up my robe.
Untie me Bette. For fucks sake you cant leave me like this in the bed.
I put the robe on and walk slowly over to her to untie her hands. I avoid looking at her but cant help taking in her scent. Her body wash, shampoo and sex combine into a fragrance uniquely Tina. Im going to miss that smell.
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Ouch! I totally felt Bette’s pain in that.
WOW!
that’s hard, and totally sucks!!! continue please, would like to see the out come.
Yeah, I think it may be a big issue for a real lesbian. I think I can’t bear it if my partner asked me using a strap-on because of having feelings for men.
That was really sad,and very understandable,if she hasnt lost Tina to a man ,shes`possibly lost her to a sex toy!!!Either way She`s lost her….
i don’t agree, i think if bette didn’t treat her so gingerly all the time, and just f…ed her every once in a while with whatever means they both agree on, then it would just add a new dimension to their lovemaking not ruin it!!!!
Wow, what a whole bunch to think about, I can totally see Bette’s thoughts in all this and have to agree with her when Tina is feeling like wanting a man…This is not the same as a partner using a toy to add some variance…this is so much more than that and not in a good way…Don’t leave us there, what is Tina’s reaction to bette’s reaction??
Chase…It doesn’t matter what you write…it is always great. This story is harsh. I feel for Bette. I agree w/honda90.Bette is between the proverbial rock and a hard place. Please continue, if you want to.
whoa ok my mind still wrapping around this!! we need to c t’s reaction
very sad. i can totally understand bette’s feelings and emotions. as honda90 said, tina didn’t want this to spice things up, it was a substitute for the “real thing”… i’ve always had a feeling that bette is into natural stuff (even when we saw one of the deleted scenes for 3.2 or 3.3 when bette said she was just “a little unhappy”)
I’m feeling Bette on this one. Thanks sweetie!
I enjoy whatever you write and this was a difficult subject. Feels like the beginning of the end but there’s always a ray of hope. I look forward to reading Tina’s point of view soon.
Your insight into Bette’s feelings is almost devestating. It doesn’t look good. I’m really curious to see what the next chapter will hold. Thanks Chasemenow.
Wow, the emotion emiting from Bette was more than painful. It was deadly. Beautifuly written, but heart-wrenching.
Poor Bette. That was like a stake going thru her heart.
Yeah, as long as this was part of Tina’s “feelings” about men and not an expansion of her relationship with Bette, I can understand Bette’s dismay. Interesting set up and interested to see Tina’s response to Bette and the experience.
tina is a dumb ass
I agree with honda90. There is a huge difference between wanting a sex toy to either spice up your sex life with your partner, or your own self gratification…and telling your partner that you have feelings for men, and if she doesn’t do this to you, you will just go find some man to do it. Big difference. My heart was breaking for both of them. I also agree that you should continue. I want to see if Tina will understand where Bette is coming from. Thanks Chase!!
Interesting idea for a story…Tina needs to take her confusion elsewhere b/c she’s breaking Bette’s heart into pieces.
Tina didnt want Bette she just wanted the feel of the strap on. All Bette did was to help her make up her mind to go with men. Doesnt Tina realize the pain she put Bette through? It suck and Bette knows it thanks
i totally understand bette..hopefully tina does too and they should talk and maybe tina’s feelings for men are not real…i hope you’ll continue with that
well don’t stop there. let’s see if bette leaves Tina before T has chance to leave her.
More please.
an excellent experiment. if she really wants men, though, nothing but the real thing is going to cut it.
Chase – you made a perfect case for why these two need to talk about why they are together – it’s never a good idea in my book to do something sexually you don’t feel good about it doesn’ build intimacy it builds insecurity.
Sad, so very sad.
That made me sad…but I hope you continue. thanks.
Wow, it would be interesting to continue at least one more chapter as Bette leaves Tina and Tina is forced to see the impact of her request/decsion. She wanted this so bad she was deaf to Bette’s plea. So sad, but so Tina.
Wow thats hurt Bette and sad too. Ok post soon please, thanks!
you have to go on with this
“God I am so lost.†Well, that makes 2 of us Bette. I can’t even process this right now. Tina is as loopy as the day is long and poor Bette is only trying to please her. And for what? Damn Chase, leave it to you to write something like this. What’d you do? Hop aboard the fanfic express to the dark side? Thank goodness Henry & his erection weren’t in this one. Ick. You bet your skittles you’re walking a fine line… and so is Tina. She needs to stay on either side and not straddle the middle. This was too painful for words, but somehow you captured emotions that couldn’t otherwise be described.